#probably will skip s5 cause nothing changes

[outrunningthedark]

I had a nonnie in my inbox who asked me to expand my thoughts on the sperm donor arc and when I tried to post I got an error, so here is the answer without exact context, ugh:

I'm glad you brought this up because it's giving me a chance to express my thoughts more...calmly, as opposed to the *screaming into the void* moment I had yesterday. I, personally, am not a fan of what the show has done to Buck's character since season four. To me, it feels like the intention was to go one way with his story (the therapy arc, maybe revisit things with the parents in s5 to officially move on to the next phase), but then...problems? unforeseen circumstances? changed it up. I mean...think about it. We get this "huge" Buck backstory, he realizes he needs to start learning about his past/accepting it, and then...two episodes later...here comes his former hookup who causes nothing but drama and she's not just a blip on the radar again. They're bringing her back to be part of the cast in s5. If you want my opinion (and this is not a slight on any actors because it is what it is), once it was realized that Jennifer was pregnant and she would have to be written out, and then the question turned to what to do with Chimney... Buck in healing mode didn't mesh with how the audience would expect him to react to Madney "leaving", so...why not let him self-destruct even more! The show abandoned the therapy arc. That's the part people are ignoring. That's the part that makes their arguments about "healing not being linear" irrelevant. There was no hint at healing beyond those two conversations (the end of 4x05 and beginning of 4x06). Shit happened and the show changed course. Very quickly. Skipping ahead to the sperm donor storyline...Well. I would argue that it narratively doesn't make *total* sense when we left off 5x18 with Buck finally doing something for himself by breaking up with TayKay. Maybe if it was TayKay who cut ties, we could more easily accept him still not being willing to listen to that voice inside that knows he's doing the wrong thing(s). Also, now that we know "radical acceptance" isn't supposed to be explained the way Buck explained it (they should have just stuck with "saying yes to possibilities")...I'm annoyed that his behavior is the antithesis of radical acceptance and looking at the show like "you just threw fancy words out there hoping people would call you genius, huh?" (Sad to say it worked.) It makes the fandom look dumb af, too, "He's saying yes without thinking! He's bound to backslide!" He's...he's not performing radical acceptance until he STOPS falling into old habits, actually. It's now a conversation that could have been avoided if they didn't use THAT exact term. 🤦‍♀️ (It's like someone decided they should use a word other than 'open-minded' or even 'automatic' and chose radical without considering it's a real phrase with a completely different connotation.) I'm not a fan of the sperm donor arc, I've made no secret of that. The timing of it (to me) seems like a way to appease the people who want to think of him as a father (because Chris isn't biologically his and therefore it doesn't count 🙃) since it's probably gonna be awhile until he has a bio kid of his own, if ever. But. I was trying to stay optimistic. "Well, surely, this is not gonna work out and he's gonna have a moment where he realizes his purpose is to build/be a family with Eddie and Chris." And by "not work out" I mean he gets rejected or the attempts aren't successful. *That* would have been my preferred scenario - he makes a rash decision, but backs out before it's too late because he's finally like "Wtf am I doing? This isn't gonna make me happy." *That* would have fit with him putting himself first. *That* would have been a way to expand on the growth we saw a glimpse of in 5x18. Now...there might be a baby? (Still allowing a 1% chance that it ends up being Connor's baby after all...) And as long as there's a baby, people aren't going to let it go. "Is Buck gonna have to save his bio kid when they get sick???" "Will Connor and Kameron die to bring up a new trauma for Buck???" "Are we gonna get Big Man, Tiny Baby because he gets to be a friend to the family???" And the thing is...I can't blame people for going there with it. As long as there is a (hypothetical) child in the story, the show could bring them up at any time. To some in the fandom, Buck should be capable of walking away peacefully from this situation he's found himself in, but the fandom is not in the writers' room. If the show doesn't have any "better" ideas, if the show needs easy drama...Buck's attitude could change on a dime. The saving grace is that this storyline is happening now when (I highly doubt) we'll get to a season where the child is old enough to want to get to know their dad. Because you know that would happen.

[sibillascribbles08]

Prisoner

What, more changeling AU? Wack.

If you haven’t seen this before check the tag on my blog.

    Where was he? 

    Cryptor came to, his vision clear and sharp with a few windows hovering in the corners giving him additional information. He was booting up. Some of his memory couldn’t be recovered. 

    His last active period was over a month ago.

    Cryptor sat up, trying desperately to put some pieces together as he stared around the dark, rock covered room. Moving further made him realize his arms were trapped in cuffs, chained to the wall. He stared at his hand for a while, at the shiny titanium. Why did it feel unfamiliar? 

    An upgrade. That’s right. He finally got the upgrade he wanted after walking around in his outdated form. Why did he have that in the first place? Zane, that other nindroid, he stole Cryptor’s original body. It’d been horrible. It sucked. But for whatever reason Cryptor wound up aiding the ninja to destroy the person he once served. He helped the ninja escape from space. Even if it--

    He was hit hard by the memory of smoke flooding his throat. Everything went dark after that. A huge gap. But that couldn’t be it. He got this upgrade didn’t he? 

    Pixal had made it. Right! Reusing some leftovers and some new materials in Borg’s lab. He remembered waking up there. He remembered her snark. She was trying to update him on what happened to the Overlord, to the golden weapons. Then Cryptor saw movement. He tried to warn her and then--

    “Pixal?” He said out loud. There was obviously no one else in this room. This prison cell.

    “You’re finally awake.” Her voice came from nearby. As she spoke a light flashed from a small window near the ceiling. 

    “Finally? How long have you been up?” He tugged at the chains, just on the off chance one of them was brittle. No luck. 

    “About a week longer than you. Took a while to…” She trailed off. “Are you completely intact?” 

    Cryptor looked up at his arms again, then down at his legs. Seemed everything was there, and he even had on a gi, though the silver material matched the shade of his plating. 

    “Seems like it.” He finally answered. 

    “Can you access the saw in your wrist?”

    Cryptor blinked. “There’s a saw in my wrist?” 

    “I spared no expense when I designed your upgrade.” She gave a light “humph.” “See if you can access it and break out of here.” 

    Okay, how was he supposed to do that? Cryptor snapped his wrist. Nothing. He tried to pull up a command module but his vision was instantly cluttered with a list of commands. Ugh, couldn’t Pixal have put in a search function for these? He mumbled the word to himself over and over again until finally he spotted the word. He focused on it, and his system did the rest. He heard the pop before looking up to see a vertical slot in his wrist open. The blade came out before it began to spin. Sparks flew from the cuff and the metal screamed. 

    “What’s going on?” A voice came from outside. 

Cryptor frantically commanded the saw to retreat and it did, his wrist sliding closed. A shadow passed by the door window and he shut his eyes, trying to pretend he was still unconscious. 

The person scoffed. “Tch, must be those rats.” Their footsteps retreated from the door.

Cryptor opened one eye before the other, making sure the coast was clear. Still, he didn’t start back up yet. He’d need to wait for a better opportunity. 

-----------------------

    The screaming from above was the opportunity he was looking for.

    No telling what it was, or why, but it sounded excited so he assumed no one was dying. Or maybe they were, a blood sport or something. Didn’t matter, he needed to move.

    A few more minutes of sawing freed his right hand. He worked on the other, trying to hold it steady so he didn’t end up cutting his arm in the process. As soon as he was free he went for the window. Not all that big, but big enough for him to fit through.

    “What are you doing?” Pixal said. “Get out of here.” 

    “Without you? Are you insane?” He chopped away at the bars, cursing how slow it was. “I still have to thank you for giving me this upgrade in the first place.” 

    “You can come back later. You need to get out of here now.” 

    “No.” He sliced through most of the three bars before slamming his elbow into them. They all popped free. Cryptor pulled himself through the small gap, but was unable to get his legs out properly to keep him from landing on his face.

    No matter, he was durable now. He got back up, dusting off his top before looking around the room for Pixal. 

    He didn’t see her. Just a desk with a large monitor and--

    Ah, that was her arm sitting next to it, wasn’t it?

    “Pixal?” He walked around the desk, seeing more bits of plating, wires, sockets, and more. “Were you?”

    “Scrapped?” The monitor flashed, finally revealing a blurry image of her face. “Indeed. Why I told you it was a waste of time coming in here.” 

    “What did they do this for?” Cryptor studied the computer, trying to think of how her consciousness was still active if she was in pieces. Had to be her hard drive. 

    “Information. I was just a bonus to whoever took you.” An image of the attacker’s face appeared on screen, though it was barely visible between the red bandanna over his mouth and the wide straw hat on his head. “Chen used me to get information on the ninja, for whatever he’s planning.”

    “Chen?”

    “That’s not important.” She glared. “You need to leave.” 

    “And I already told you I’m not going anywhere without you.”

    Ducking below the desk he saw the tower for the screen. It definitely wasn’t anything put together by a pro, a bunch of parts put together with wires coming out of the side. In the front was a slot, definitely big enough for a hard drive. He pushed down hard on the button next to it and the drive popped out. The monitor above went silent. 

    Cryptor held it in his hands for a moment. The drive had Borg’s handwriting on it. Pixal’s factory name as well as the number fourteen. He turned it around a few times before looking up a way to see if he could hide this in his systems somewhere. Seemed there was a slow for it at the base of his neck. 

    No idea if that would fry his systems, but whatever. Cryptor fitted the drive in. Chills ran through his systems as everything on it collided with his own control panel. A few moments later it all settled down, and a small image of Pixal appeared in the corner of his vision.

    “Really?” She had her arms crossed. “You think this was the best idea?”

    “Well what else am I supposed to do? Put you in my pocket?” He tried to glare at her. “You could just say thanks.” 

    “You’re still wasting time. You need to--” An alert symbol popped up over her screen. “Cryptor! Look out!”

    He cleared everything away only to see the face of a man covered in face paint, a snake skull on the top of his head. He raised a hammer and brought it down. 

--------------

    Two days of a raging headache was driving Cryptor insane.

    After getting caught off guard he woke up, chained, with two alerts that wouldn’t go away until Pixal made them. He must have a dent in his head somewhere. Wonderful. 

    He’d cut himself free again but getting out was proving impossible. The guards were always stationed nearby. He had nowhere to run but the open hallway. 

    “Come on, get moving.” The guard’s voice came from outside. Cryptor could see shadows passing from the window that he sat close to, even at the risk of the guards noticing he wasn’t where he was supposed to be. It made it easier to listen and gather information. 

    “The amount of footsteps has increased.” Pixal commented. “They seem to be bringing in more and more prisoners.” 

    “Are you surprised?” Cryptor kept his voice low. “Whatever this Chen guy set up, he probably needs a lot of power to do it.”

    Pixal had to be the one to inform him that his ice abilities were gone, likely stolen. She’d kept his same power source when rebuilding him. It was safe to assume he was stealing other elemental powers, which included the ninja. 

    Something tapped on the bars above. “Zane?”

    Cryptor flinched at the name, cursed the fact Pixal hadn’t changed his voice, then glanced up to see Cole’s face pressed against the window. Took a second to recognize him, however, his face was covered in something white. Flour? 

    Cryptor stood, but only enough that he was visible from the corner of the window. “Not Zane. But nice try.” 

    “Cryptor?” Cole’s eyes widened before he sighed. “Right. I should have guessed.” 

    Cryptor rolled his eyes. “Surprise. It’s not who you’re looking for. Still don’t know why you’re looking for him.”

    “Chen said he had him.” Cole frowned. “Said we had to come here to find him.” 

    “Surprise, he probably mistook me for Zane too.” Cryptor waved a hand. “Now if I’m not who you’re looking for, beat it. I have to find my way out of here.”

    The guard shouted from farther down the hall. “Hey, what’s the hold up?” 

    Another unfamiliar voice spoke. “Uh, Karlof just tying shoe.” 

    “Look.” Cole lowered his voice. “Even if you aren’t Zane we are busting out of here. All of us.” 

    Cryptor glared. “I don’t want your pity and I don’t want your help.” 

    “Hey--”

    The guard spoke again. “Wait a minute. You don’t even wear shoes.” 

    Cole cursed and let go of the bars. “Gotta go.” 

    Cryptor didn’t reply to that. He just ducked back down into his hiding spot and waited for the footsteps to retreat. 

    “Do you really not want their help?” Pixal chimed in. 

    “No.” He got up and moved back to where he was supposed to be imprisoned. “Not if they’re going to keep treating me like some second rate fill in for someone who straight up betrayed them. Not if they’re going to keep acting like I’m the bad guy here.” 

    She rolled her eyes. “I thought you liked being the bad guy.” 

    “I don’t know.” He hissed. “I don’t know what I want anymore. But I definitely don’t want to be stuck in here.” 

    “In that case,” Pixal stared at him, “I suggest you accept their help.” 

--------------

    Pixal finally convinced Cryptor to accept any help that came his way, but now he was regretting it. 

    He and Cole ran through the small cave system underneath the island, a giant snake hot on their trail. At first the plan seemed clever. Cole got himself punished, stole the keys, broke them both out, but now they had to deal with this and no elemental powers to help. 

    Not to mention the amount of dead ends.

    “Ugh, now what.” Cole slammed his fists against the stone wall. It was barely enough strength to knock some dust off the ceiling. 

    Weapons, weapons, Pixal fitted him with a saw did she fit him with any weapons?

    “Exploding shurikens.” Pixal brought up the command. Five of the weapons sprung out of his arm. 

    The snake slithered toward them. Cryptor reached for the weapons but Cole reacted faster. He hurled them one after another at the tunnel in front of them. 

    They exploded on impact. The cave shook as the rocks crumbled. As soon as one bonked the snake on the snout it began to retreat. Eventually the entire exit was covered in rocks. 

    “Well.” Cole put his hands on his hips, still trying to catch his breath. “That takes care of that.” 

    “And how are we supposed to get out now?” Cryptor gestured to the exit.

    Cole just pointed to the empty space above them. 

    He groaned, smacking himself on the forehead before he just sat down. He needed a minute to cool down. 

    “You could say thanks for helping you get out.” Cole frowned at him. 

    “I told you before I don’t want your help.” Cryptor snapped. “Especially since you have no damn reason to be helping me in the first place.” 

    That got the ninja to glare. “What are you talking about?” 

    “Don’t act stupid all of a sudden.” Cryptor pointed at him. “The entire time I’ve been around you guys until I got wasted trying to keep the space shuttle from blowing up it was nothing but: ‘We can’t trust you.’ ‘You’re evil.’ ‘Just what evil thing are you planning?’ ‘We have to try and get Zane back who blatantly betrayed us by switching sides and tried more than once to kill us.’” He let his back hit the wall as he stared at the tunnel up above. “Sorry, but I’m not Zane, and I still have no damn idea why you even want him back.” 

    “Because you didn’t know him before all that.” Cole sat down as well. “But I know you’re not wrong. We still don’t know why he did what he did. Or why he stole the golden weapons.” 

    Cryptor blinked. “He what?” 

    “Ah, sorry, forgot you were out for that.” Cole rubbed his neck. 

    Why hadn’t Pixal informed him? He glanced at her and she shrugged. 

    “Yeah after we landed we went to confront him but… him and the entire nindroid army were gone. Pythor told us that Zane apparently stole the golden weapons, killed the Overlord, and ran off with the army. We still haven’t found him.” He let out a long sigh. “And he wasn’t the only one we were looking for. Pixal said she was going to repair you and then we just… never heard back. Borg finally contacted us, frantic at why she was missing. We were searching pretty much non-stop this past month.” 

    Cryptor glared again. “But you didn’t even come here looking for her either.” 

    “A lead is a lead, okay?” Cole snapped. “It didn’t matter if I wanted to find her first, we had to take what we got.” He rubbed his neck again, cheeks going a bit dark. “Look, we did want to find you too. Lloyd especially. Sorry we kept treating you like an enemy even if you stopped being one.” 

    Cryptor scoffed. “Fine. I’ll get out of here with you, but only as a favor to Lloyd.” 

    “Do you know where Pixal is?” Cole asked. “I mean, she went missing the same time you did.” 

    He studied the ninja for a second, the hand still on his neck and the blush still on his cheeks. “I might know where she is. What has you so interested?”

    “Huh?” Cole’s cheeks somehow got even darker. “Well I’m just worried. I mean, she helped us a lot against the Overlord, really smart, nice having her around.” 

    Cryptor hummed. “I see. You have a crush on my sister.” 

    “Wh-what?” Cole flinched back. “I didn’t say that! That’s not important anyway. Where is she?” 

    He couldn’t keep himself from smirking. “Oh, she’s sharing my headspace for the time being. Had to carry her hard drive somehow. She’s been listening the whole time.” 

    Cole’s eyes went wide. “Y-you’re lying about that.” 

    Cryptor shook his head, not able to keep himself from laughing as Pixal stared at him with disapproval. “Don’t worry. I’m pretty sure she’s at least not disgusted by you.” 

    The ninja glared this time and got up. “That’s it. Changed my mind. I’m not helping you out anymore.” 

    “Oh, too bad earth boy.” Cryptor got up as well and threw an arm around his shoulder. “You’re stuck with me now, especially if you want to help Pixal get out of here. So, what’s the plan?”

[espejonight28738]

The Destiel Story (A Playlist)

Merry Christmas! Here’s my gift to y'all. I made a chronological playlist of destiel, and I’ll explain each song on by one. Or if you aren’t interested in reading that much (3) HERE you have the spotify playlist :)

Tagging: @verobatto-angelxhunter @agusvedder @legendary-destiel Happpy Holidays :3

04×01/04×06 Infra-red -Three Days Grace Just getting to know each other

Everyone’s living in black and white We see each other in a different light That’s why I look at you like I do Like nobody else is even in the room [...] In Infra-red The heat and the light and the way you move Like nobody else is in the room If you fall into me, I fall into you I see you, I see you

04×07/04×20 You Found Me - The Fray In 04×07 we have the whole “I’ll tell you something if you promise not to tell another soul”, so trust begins to flourish here.

Lost and insecure You found me, you found me Lying on the floor Surrounded, surrounded Why’d you have to wait? Where were you, where were you? Just a little late You found me, you found me

04×21/ 05×03 - Angel With a Shotgun - The Cab You know, rebel against heaven and everything you ever believed for a friend. It’s casual.

They say before you start a war You better know what you’re fighting for Well baby, you are all that I adore If love is what you need, a soldier I will be I’m an angel with a shotgun Fighting til’ the wars won I don’t care if heaven won’t take me back I’ll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe Don’t you know you’re everything I have? And I, wanna live, not just survive, tonight

04×05 - Stoned on You - James Young I was about to put Toxic, but I think that joke’s been made to many times already.

Girl, I get stoned on you Rubbing my bones on you (yeah) Nothing else burns like you do (no) Oh Lord, I get stoned on you, oh Stoned!

05×05/22×05 - Dangerous Night - Imagine Dragons Does it happen to y'all that you are trying to stop The Apocalypse, but you keep having gay thoughts about your angel? Annoying, I know

What a dangerous night to fall in love Don’t know why we still hide what we’ve become (oh, oh) Do you wanna cross the line? We’re runnin’ out of time A dangerous night to fall in love Started a stranger, a love endangered The edge of a night The face of an angel, the heart of a ghost Was it a dream?

Time Skip bewtwen s5/s6 Dare I Say - Alexander Rybak If only Cas had kept contact with Dean, I would be able to use Lips Of An Angel, but no, he had to go all MIA. But this song’s still good so. Cas POV, btw.

She doesn’t know that I’m thinking of her […] She makes me glad just by being alright Though I would wish that just for one night She would come back and again we’ll be friends Like those times where love never ends […] You said you love him the last time we met Please tell your boyfriend that I’m not a threat I know the difference between right and wrong […] But dare I say you are amazing in every way? And would you mind if we woke up with each other each day? But then I remember that I’m just a guy And still I keep dreaming of you ‘cause that’s all I can do

06×01/06×19 I’m Not An Angel - Halestorm Cas POV again. S6 is so angsty istg I had like 300 possibles songs for each of the following parts. 

You saw all the signs, but you let it go You closed your eyes […] Hate being that wall That you hit when you feel that you gave it all I keep taking the blame When we both know that I’ll never change […] I wasn’t always this way I used to be the one with the halo But that disappeared when I had my first taste And fell from grace and left me in this place

06×20 Set Fire To The Rain - Adele You can’t have a descent playlist without Adele, amirite? Dean’s POV this time. Poor baby really felt betrayed. The Man Who Would be King is probably one of my faves episodes tbh.

But there’s a side to you That I never knew, never knew All the things you’d say They were never true, never true And the games you play You would always win, always win […] I set fire to the rain And I threw us into the flames Well, it felt something died 'Cause I knew that that was The last time, the last time Sometimes I wake up by the door, That heart you caught must be waiting for you Even now when we’re already over I can’t help myself from looking for you

06×21/06×22 Angels - Within Temptation I love this song so much and it’s so destiel in these episodes I swear I can’t for how much it fits. Dean’s POV

Sparkling Angel, I believed You were my saviour, in my time of need Blinded by faith, I couldn’t hear, All the whispers, the warnings so clear […] You took my heart, deceived me right from the start You showed me dreams, I wish they’d turn into real You broke the promise and made me realize It was all just a lie

07×01/ 07×02 - What Have You Done - Within Temptation  I don’t know whose POV, but this song is so perfect I can’t believe no one has thought of this before.

Would you mind I kill you? Would you mind if I tried to? Cause you have Turn into my worst enemy You carry hate that I don’t feel. It’s over now, what have you done? (What have you done now?) I, I’ve been waiting for someone like you But now you are slipping away (What have you done now?) Why, why does fate make us suffer? There’s a curse between us Between me and you

07×03/07×16 Incomplete - Backstreet Boys And in this Dean Grieving Cas Pt.1, we have a little bit of denial and a lot of heart-brokenness.

I tried to go on like I never knew you I’m awake, but my world if hald asleep I pray for this heart to be unbroken But without you all I’m going to be is incomplete […] I don’t mean to drag it on But I can’t seem to let you go I don’t want to make you face this world alone I want to let you go

07×17 Taking Over Me - Evanescence The Born Again Identity. Dean’s POV. No more comments.

You don’t remember me, but I remember you I lie awake and try so hard not to think of you But who can decide what they dream? And dream I do I believe in you I’ll give up everything just to find you I have to be with you to live to breathe You’re taking over me Have you forgotten all I know And all we had? You saw me mourning my love for you And touched my hand I knew you loved me then

07×18/07×22 Clarity - Zedd Is this a joke about Crazy!Cas? Maybe. But I think it’s mostly serious. Probably.

Cause you are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need Chasing relentlessly Still fight and I don’t know why If our love is tragedy why are you my remedy If our love’s insanity why are you my clarity

Purgatory - A Thousand Years - Christina Perry The Purgatory storyline makes me so emotional I love it so much and now we are going back and- If they don’t solve their problems so I can add Halo to this playlist then what’s even the fucking point.

How to be brave? How can I love when I’m afraid to fall? But watching you stand alone All of my doubt Suddenly goes away somehow One step closer I have died every day waiting for you Darling, don’t be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years I’ll love you for a thousand more […] And all along I believed I would find you Time has brought your heart to me I have loved you for a thousand years I’ll love you for a thousand more

08×01/08×07 The Night We Met - Lord Huron Dean trying to deal with his feelings about leaving Cas behind, and his really platonic hallucinations.

I had all and then most of you Some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met I don’t know what I’m supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met

08×08/08×16 Somebody That I Used To Know - Gotye Dean’s POV hurting because Cas is acting strange and doesn’t respond to his prayers even after all they lived together in Purgatory.

But you didn’t have to cut me off Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing And I don’t even need your love But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough No, you didn’t have to stoop so low Have your friends collect your records and then change your number I guess that I don’t need that though Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

08×17 Find my way back - Eric Arjes Cas finding his way to Dean even with Naomi’s brainwashing :D

On my way now Don’t give up on me And no one knows what What tomorrow brings These weary eyes will never rest Until they look in yours again […] There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do I’ll find my way back to you I’ll find my way back to you I’ll find my way back Into the dark to chase your heart No distance could ever tear us apart There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do I’ll find my way back to you

08×18/09×02 Hold On - Chord Overstreet Cas bailing on Dean -again-, and going AWOL -again-, and then saying he will close Heaven and probably die, or in the least never see each other again.

Loving and fighting Accusing, denying I can’t imagine a world with you gone The joy and the chaos, the demons we’re made of I’d be so lost if you left me alone […] I don’t wanna let go I know I’m not that strong I just wanna hear you Saying baby, let’s go home Let’s go home Yeah, I just wanna take you home Hold on, I still want you Come back, I still need you

09×03 To Good at Goodbyes - Sam Smith I won’t comment this chapter bc it still hurts me :) “You can’t stay”

I know you’re thinking I’m heartless I know you’re thinking I’m cold I’m just protecting my innocence I’m just protecting my soul […] But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry And every time you walk out, the less I love you Baby, we don’t stand a chance, it’s sad but it’s true I’m way to good at goodbyes

09×06 Do I Wanna Know - Artic Monkeys This is POV both of them kinda, I don’t know how to explain it, it just gives me the vibe. An alternative to this if you like music in spanish, is “Ex de verdad” from Ha-Ash. I think that one is much funnier for the situation, but I decided for english only :(

Do I wanna know If this feelin’ flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hopin’ that you’d stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For sayin’ things that you can’t say tomorrow day Crawlin’ back to you Ever thought of callin’ when You’ve had a few? 'Cause I always do Maybe I’m too Busy bein’ yours To fall for somebody new Now, I’ve thought it through Crawlin’ back to you

09×07/09×23 I Would Do Anything For Love - Meat Loaf “His true weakness is revealed. He’s in love. With Humanity.”

As long as the planets are turning As long as the stars are burning As long dreams are coming true You’d better believe it, that I would do Anything for love Oh I would do anything for love Oh I would do anything for love

10×01/ 10×03 My Demons - Starset This is completely serious. I swear.

Take me over the walls below Fly forever Don’t let me go I need a savior to heal my pain When I become my worst enemy The enemy […] Take me high and I’ll sing Oh you make everything okay (okay, okay) We are one in the same Oh you take all of the pain away (away, away) Save me if I become My demons

10×04 /10×22 No Rest -Dry the River A.K.A time for the angsty parallel Cain/Colette & Dean/Cas

Did you see the light in my heart? Did you see the sweat on my brow? Did you see the fear in my heart? Did you see me bleeding out? I loved you in the best I loved you in the best way possible I loved you in the best way possible I loved you in the best way possible I loved you in the best

10×23 /11×10 Next to Me - Imagine Dragons -I almost killed you bc of the Mark of Cain and then you almost killed me with Rowena’s spell but still here we are.

Oh, I always let you down You’re shattered on the ground But still I find you there Next to me And oh, stupid things I do I’m far from good, it’s true But still I find you Next to me

11×11/11×22 If You Only Knew - Shinedown *Violently pinning while Cas is being Lucifer’s vessel*

If you only knew How I refuse to let you go, Even when you’re gone I don’t regret any days I Spent, nights we shared, Or letters that I sent It’s 4:03 and I can’t sleep Without you next to me I Toss and turn like the sea If I drown tonight, bring me Back to life Breathe your breath in me The only thing that I still believe In is you, if you only knew […] You help me live and learn

11×23 I’ll Follow You Into The Dark - Gavin Mikhail “I could go with you” GOD do they make me cry

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied And illuminate the no’s on their vacancy signs If there’s no one beside you when your soul embarks Then I’ll follow you into the dark

12×01 Arms - Christina Perry That hug so cute, my babies.

I tried my best to never let you in to see the truth And I’ve never opened up I’ve never truly loved 'till you put your arms around me And I believe that it’s easier for you to let me go […] You put your arms around me and I’m home

12×02/12×09 I Found - Amber Run *Pining bc Cas doesn’t pay attention to you because he is looking for Lucifer*

I’ll use you as a warning sign That if you talk enough sense then you’ll lose your mind And I’ll use you as a focal point So I don’t lose sight of what I want And I’ve moved further than I thought I could But I missed you more than I thought I would And I’ll use you as a warning sign That if you talk enough sense then you’ll lose your mind

12×10 Hot N Cold - Katy Perry I could have used a more serious one, but the best part of the episode is them bickering like an old married couple.

'Cause you’re hot then you’re cold You’re yes then you’re no You’re in then you’re out You’re up then you’re down You’re wrong when it’s right It’s black and it’s white We fight, we break up We kiss, we make up (You) You don’t really want to stay, no (You) But you don’t really want to go-o

12×11 - Losing your Memory - Ryan Star This is the episode where Dean gets witched into amnesia.

Call all your friends And tell them you’re never coming back Cause this is the end Pretend that you want it […] I would have died I would have loved you all my life You’re losing your memory now You’re losing your memory now You’re losing your memory now You’re losing your memory, now

12×12 In The Name of Love - Martin Garrix, Bebe Rexha “I love you.” *looks at Dean* “I love all of you" 

If I told you this was only gonna hurt If I warned you that the fire’s gonna burn Would you walk in? Would you let me do it first? Do it all in the name of love Would you let me lead you even when you’re blind? In the darkness, in the middle of the night In the silence, when there’s no one by your side Would you call in the name of love? In the name of love, name of love In the name of love, name of love

12×13/12×18- I Don’t Wanna Live Forever - ZAYN, Taylor Swift *Cas keeps going after Lucifer’s child instead of paying attention to Dean*

Been sitting eyes wide open behind these four walls, hoping you’d call It’s just a cruel existence like there’s no point hoping at all Baby, baby, I feel crazy, up all night, all night and every day Give me something, oh, but you say nothing What is happening to me? […] I just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home

12×19 Thank You - Led Zeppelin This song has absolutely no relation to the episode but I KNOW Dean put it in the mixtape in hopes that Cas would do 1+1 and understand his confession, but he didn’t. And you can pry that headcanon from my COLD DEAD FINGERS.

If the sun refused to shine I would still be loving you When mountains crumble to the sea There will still be you and me Little drops of rain whisper of the pain Tears of loves lost in the days gone by My love is strong, with you there is no wrong Together we shall go until we die My, my, my inspiration is what you are to me Inspiration look, see

12×23 Slipped Away - Avril Lavigne :)))) Do not think of Dean on his knees next to Cas’ body and the burned wings.

Now you’re gone, now you’re gone There you go, there you go Somewhere I can’t bring you back Now you’re gone, now you’re gone There you go, there you go Somewhere, you’re not coming back The day you slipped away Was the day I found it won’t be the same, no The day you slipped away Was the day that I found it won’t be the same, oh

13×01/ 13×05 Dark Paradise - Lana de Rey Dean grieving Cas Pt.2 but this time he takes it like, a thousand times worse.

All my friends tell me I should move on I’m lying in the ocean, singing your song Ah, that’s how you sing it Loving you forever, can’t be wrong Even though you’re not here, won’t move on Ah, that’s how we play it And there’s no remedy for memory your face Is like a melody, it won’t leave my head Your soul is haunting me and telling me That everything is fine But I wish I was dead Every time I close my eyes It’s like a dark paradise No one compares to you I’m scared that you won’t be waiting on the other side

13×06 Better Than I Know Myself - Adam Lambert Brokebacknatural. Dean being a happy ray of sunshine now that he got his sunshine back.

Cold as ice And more bitter than a December Winter night That’s how I treated you And I know that II sometimes tend to lose my temper And I cross the line Yeah that’s the truth I know it gets hard sometimes But I could never Leave your side No matter what I say 'Cause if I wanted to go I would’ve gone by now but I really need you near me To keep my mind off the edge If I wanted to leave I would’ve left by now But you’re the only one that knows me Better than I know myself

Emm… from here I’ll be skipping many episodes because, as you know, the writers decided that Dean and Cas didn’t need to interact for anything other than talking about Jack, because it’s not like they had a profound bond or anything, right? 

14×22 September - Daughtry Dean seeing what would have been of Cas if they haven’t met.

Of all the things I still remember Summer’s never looked the same The years go by and time just seems to fly But the memories remain In the middle of September we’d still play out in the rain Nothing to lose but everything to gain Reflecting now on how things could’ve been It was worth it in the end

13×23/14×02 Hymn for the Missing - Red *Reverse pinning now with Cas pinning for a Dean that’s being Michael’s vessel*

Where are you now? Are you lost? Will I find you again? Are you alone? Are you afraid? Are you searching for me? Why did you go? I had to stay Now I’m reaching for you Will you wait, will you wait? Will I see you again?

14×03/14×17 Stone - James Young This is… mostly just from 14×14 with Dean and Cas’ talk when Jack went to the bathroom bc they still never talk.

Your father came and went like the ocean’s tide And the day he left he never said goodbye […] You’ve been waiting for a miracle all your life […] So give me all your pain And love will set you free Give all your shame Put all your weight on me And I’ll be the stone you need me to be

14×18 /15×02 Bad Guy - Set it Off Look! They are talking again and- and now they are fighting. And Dean is blaming Cas for things that weren’t his fault. *sighting* Cas POV

I stole the moon I made the stars align I showed you how to fly And you made me the bad guy I fought for you I kept you safe at night I would have risked my life And you made me the bad guy

15×03 Fade - Lewis Cappaldi The DivorceTM 

Well, I know that we’ve been hardly holding on To tell the truth, I can’t believe we got this far Running near on empty I wish somebody would’ve told me That I’d end up so caught up in need of your demons That I’d be lost without you leading me astray Guess that I’m a fool for the way that you caught me Girl, you make my heart break more every day But don’t fade away

15×04/15×06 - Always - Gavin James And now we are pretending you are okay with the fact Cas dumped you? Okay, let’s pretend the drinking and comfort food ain’t signals of depression

What am I supposed to do without you? Is it too late to pick the pieces up? Too soon to let them go? Do you feel damaged just like I do? Your face, it makes my body ache It won’t leave me alone And this feels like drowning Trouble sleeping Restless dreaming You’re in my head Always, always I just got scared Away, away I’d rather choke on my bad decisions Then just carry them to my grave You’re in my head Always, always, always

15×07- Feel Something - James Young I Don’t Miss My Ex, so I’ll go have a good time with my other ex- oh no his evil. Oh no I had to kill him. Oh no I came back home and Cas won’t even look at me. Damn.

Touch me someone I’m too young to feel so Numb, numb, numb, numb […] So if you’re gonna stay, then stay But if you’re gonna go Make sure that you hurt me just enough to Make me feel something, something

15×08 Habits of My Heart - James Young So now we are pretending we aren’t sending indirects to each other? Fine. And you still don’t look at me even when you heal me AND NOT TOUCH ME. FINE.  And now our brothers are sending us to the time when our love was strongest? Where I spent a year praying to you and looking for you? I place that feels pure? Oh fuck.

You know I’d rather be alone, yeah But then you call me on the phone Oh the habits of my heart I can´t say no It’s ripping me apart You get too close You make it hard to let you go […] 'Cause I’d rather be alone But you fermented in my bones

(Note: You can measure my failure by the fact the word Angel was only 4 times in all this list.)

[safflowerseason]

What would Amy think about Bernie, Biden, Warren, and Trump?

What would Dan think about Bernie, Biden, Warren, and Trump?

Hi! What a fascinating question! I also saw your q about Dan, but I’m actually going to talk about them in the same post, if that’s okay, because I think it’s more interesting to think about them side by side :-) (and also because fundamentally…I think Dan would just follow Amy). Also, I’m approaching this question as if Dan and Amy are considering Bernie, Biden, and Warren as candidates, and thinking less about their politics. In Veep, one’s policies always matter less than..literally everything else. 

Also, I’m just going to assume that we’re talking about S1-S6 Amy and Dan, not Dark!Amy or Sex-Psychopath Dan of S7. Both of them belong at Fox News, to be honest. And in general…so much has changed from the earliest seasons of the show! I’ll get into this in more detail below, but Veep is fundamentally a show about establishment politics, and right now, we’re in a moment where multiple politicians are trying to tear down that establishment. So in that sense, it’s a difficult comparison!

As for Trump, I’m going to sidestep this question, slightly, because I think Trump is now too “big” for Veep comparisons. On his own, without being propped up by a corrupt Congress and evil billionaires, Trump is a narcissistic buffoon. But he has now become the face of a much larger and profoundly anti-democratic, racist, oligarchic, and patriarchal movement. I find it hard to talk about Trump now without placing him in the context of the global struggle for a more just, equal, open, and healthy society. And Veep…is not really equipped to explore these fundamental questions about how to make the world better, and how to fight those in power who actively want to oppress people. Veep, in its best years, was interested in the everyday grind of establishment politics: the banalities, the absurdities, the miniature power plays, the balance between political ideals and the dirty reality of achieving those ideals. Trump and his ilk are only interested in enriching themselves to the detriment of everyone else, and that…lack of nuance doesn’t really fit with Veep’s approach to politics. Mandel-era Veep is more focused on the narcissism of politicians, to be sure, but he completely skips over the real-world stakes of that narcissism. So neither era of the show is really structured to deal with the realities of Trump in 2020.

So I’ll just say that Trump is of the opposite party than Dan and Amy, who are political strategists working for a Democrat-equivalent, and so they’d never consider working for him in the first place. Amy, especially S1-S4 Amy, would find him nothing more than a repulsive, empty gasbag shouting into the void. Dan might recognize and respect Trump’s ability to manipulate the media (the one instinctive skill Trump possesses), but he’d never go work for him. Not to mention…the version of Dan who is visibly disturbed by Teddy’s harassment of Jonah would never work for a man who has sexually assaulted multiple women (and likely raped women as well).

As for the others, it’s a really interesting question! It’s a lot easier with these kinds of “Veep/real-world” questions to focus on intra-party dynamics, which was one of the show’s sweet spots.

Biden sort of strikes me as a Doyle-like figure…he’s been around forever, but doesn’t exactly inspire much political fervor. Doyle, like Biden, would probably be a pretty limp-dick candidate. It’s hard for me to see Dan or Amy getting very excited about Biden in the face of other candidates with more charisma. If this were a regular political primary (ie, no Trump), I think they’d both pass him over in favor of someone younger. (Also, if it were a regular election year, there’s no way Biden would be running. Notice how Doyle is done running for things in the Veep universe). Dan, especially, seems to be drawn to politicians who perform (superficially) well on TV, such as Danny Chung or Tom James. Still, because Biden has been around forever and has a lot of establishment friends, they can’t exactly write him off. Biden is capable of pulling a lot of strings behind the scenes that can change the entire political landscape in an instant (see Jim Clyburn’s last minute endorsement in the South Carolina primary). 

As for Bernie…the thing about Bernie is that he’s a very anti-mainstream politician, and, for better or for worse, Dan and Amy are absolutely mainstream political strategists. They are not interested in upending the status quo. Amy did not invest in Selina so early on because she was planning to burn down DC and establish a feminist political utopia. Yes, she absolutely has more progressive causes, but Selina would never eschew Wall Street donors because she believes the whole system is fundamentally broken and billionaires are inherently immoral. (Remember, Selina is the daughter of a corrupt millionaire, who herself married a corrupt millionaire…)

I was reading a Vox article about this the other day (it was a conversation between Ezra Klein and Matthew Iglesias about what a Biden administration vs. a Bernie administration would look like.) I felt this line summed up S1-S4 of Veep perfectly: 

“To the extent that the “establishment” means anything to me, it does mean that kind of nexus of Democrats who migrate back and forth onto K Street and other business community-type things. That wing of the party will have its share of the pie in a Biden administration.” 

This is what Veep S1-S4 is exploring. There’s an ever-evolving migration flow that exists between the White House and Capitol Hill and all the lobbying and consulting firms. Dan and Amy do exactly this in S4—they leave the White House and migrate to lobbying. And while to the audience it’s presented as a big change for both of them, in the big scheme of things, it’s really not. And this is what Ben proposes to Dan and Kent, regarding BKD, because it’s just the natural order of things for D.C. “lifers.” Eventually, you parlay your White House/campaign experience into some downtown consulting firm (if you have more of a conscience, you work for a big non-profit, and if you really have no conscience, you go work for Wall Street). Maybe, if you have a candidate who really blows up, you’ll end up in the White House again, but also maybe not—it doesn’t matter, you can still make a very, very good living consulting for congressmen and influencing policy from the outside.

Anyway, so because Bernie positioned his candidacy as an insurgency against the D.C. establishment, I don’t think Dan and Amy would support him, even if they might appreciate some of his policies, and even though he obviously stands at the head of a powerful political movement. Dan and Amy are establishment strategists, and they are pragmatists above all. D.C. politics is all about making alliances with people you don’t actually respect, and Bernie has, according to some, never really played that game.  

As for Warren…I can definitely see Amy being drawn to her, especially S1-S4 Amy. I do think Amy is drawn to working for women, for a variety of reasons. I could see her, like, consulting on Warren’s campaign from afar…probably to try and reign in Warren’s idealism. Dan would probably get all riled up about Warren’s wonkish tendencies and how they translate on camera. Warren was more willing to play with the establishment than Bernie was, so I think Dan and Amy would be more open to working with her even though her ideas were similarly radical. 

We do see, in S5, Amy and Dan working to elect Jonah…but he is presented as far less anti-establishment in that season. And then in S6, his stupidity just becomes a tool of the Tanzes, an evil billionaire if there ever was one. So…for me, answering this question really comes down the establishment dimension of Veep as a show. Dan and Amy aren’t revolutionaries. In so much as they want to effect change, they want to do it from the inside of the existing political system. 

[sol1056]

more asks: when retcons attack

tl;dr: harsh truth, y’all: there’s only one way out of this quagmire, and it’s not around or behind or above. It’s through. 

Let’s see. First in the list are the bunch o’ anons who want to know when Yoo left + when EPs changed + issues of S2′s writing (reveal, filler eps). 

Yoo has EP credit for all 24 episodes of S1/S2. (The three-part pilot is counted as a single episode.) Oddly, the Koplar brothers have 23 credits, skipping S1E2, Some Assembly Required. The outlines and story ideas for those episodes were probably hammered out back in 2014. Animation may get behind schedule, but it almost always does start well in advance. 

The fact that Yoo may’ve contributed greatly to the story outline doesn’t mean he has writing credit. It’s possible he made vague motions at “the team finds out Keith is part-Galra,” and left the ‘finding out’ to be handled at the script level. If Yoo did contribute enough to the story to get the EP credit for that, then he probably worked at the broadest strokes. If the episode is badly written, that’s on the writer and the story editor. 

My guess at who influenced which seasons: 

S1, S2: Yoo  S3/S4, S5: Hedrick* S6: Hedrick, with greater EP input (plus script) S7, S8: JDS and LM

* remember post-S3/S4, where the EPs’ interview tone was of not knowing what was going on. It’s possible that was more truthful than we realized at the time, if they’d left the scripts in Hedrick’s control. I have nothing to go on but my gut, but I wonder if the growing EP involvement was out of annoyance that Hedrick was setting up the pieces for Shiro’s return as Black Paladin, rather than his return and benching.

So THAT'S how EPs managed to steer the story their way, he wasn't there to stop them so they leaped at the chance post S2? And Hendrik could only try to make it make sense and keep the premise as much he could?

It’s the best explanation I can think of, at least.

With all the backlash, there’s no way [the writers] in this clusterfuck won’t spill the deets as soon as they can (in a professional way ofc) to absolve themselves for things they were forced to write

One way or another, most of the behind-the-scenes madness will come out. I can tell you this: if DW doesn’t give the EPs another show --- thus reducing the professional risk in speaking honestly --- we may get those truths sooner rather than later. If the EPs do prove to be paying someone under the table and are protected from their mistakes, we’ll still get the truth. It’ll just come at us sideways and in hints and allegations. But we will get it. 

That brings us to retcons. 

If DW want to fix VLD they can. It's only unsalvagable if EPs continue trashing canon and retconning things, and they will, but: the show has given so much to write plausible explanations: mind manipulation, AUs, messing with time, cryogenic sleep.

All of which aren’t new nor original to VLD. Those are standard SFF tropes, and anyone doing VLD (or some other futuristic SF series) will have those in their genre rolodex. The problem isn’t that VLD couldn’t tap those tropes, but that they didn’t throw them in because they were organic to the story. The EPs are proud of their rule-of-cool approach, and you can see it all over the story’s flaws. They threw in whatever seemed cool at the time and never thought of how it might impact anything beyond that one point of cool. 

And an anon with a lot of questions:

What's your idea of a well-written retcon?

A reboot from the ground up. 

What would you advise writers to be careful of?

Ever getting suckered into retconning someone else’s work to ‘fix’ it. 

Unless you are very, very good --- and I can count on one hand the writers with the right combination of curiosity and ingenuity --- you risk making even more of a mess by creating plot holes in the course of filling other plot holes. Just avoid it, and take some other job. 

Life’s too short to be someone else’s clean-up crew. 

Also what do you think about retcons in vld s7-8? ...If S1/S2 along with watered down S3/S4 [is VLD #1 and] S5-S6 is ... VLD #2, [can] another retcon somewhat fix things? It can't erase the damage or revert VLD to S1-2 sadly, but maybe cutting the infected parts will make way for future seasons/sequels to make Voltron VLD 1 again?

How? “Cut to Bobby in the shower, waking up to realize the entire season was a dream”? You said it yourself: it won’t erase the damage. The story is broken at this point. The best we can hope for is a band-aid, some paltry attempt at closure so we can all be done and move on. 

At the very latest, S4 was the last chance for the story to turn itself around. Keep Keith on the team, have Black reject the clone, have the clone attack, let the team deal with it, find Shiro, reverse the lion swap, take down Lotor, then Haggar, then return to Earth for one last clean-up and introduce new characters and setup the continuation. 

We’re thirty-one episodes past that turning point. There’s no going back now. Whatever fresh hell is currently springing full-grown from the heads of the nostalgia-obsessed EPs... well, it’s what we’re gonna get. 

We may get band-aids, but that original story and its promising setups are gone. Nothing’s going to change that. If that frustrates you, the answer is to pummel DW Animation TV with your complaints so they’ll realize that a) there’s a diehard fandom that wants VLD done right, and b) to make sure any redo has god-tier storytellers like Ehasz or the Hageman brothers. 

VA interviews prove EPs unprofessionalism

I think the EPs’ own interviews do that all on their own, tbh.

the EPs trashed canon by changing VLD's arcs and the natural storylines the VAs recorded, and let them take the fall for making "wrong" comments. ... Jeremy reassured VLD would follow logic: Keiths sacrifice will be addressed [and he’ll] be angry at Krolia for abandoning him, Lance will use his sword [and] be someone’s first choice. None happened.

I realize now I was wrong to side-eye the older VAs for seeming to not know what was in the upcoming season. Seems like they probably ended up recording multiple versions of the story. I wonder if they still do the group watching together when the season comes out (pretty sure they did it for S3 and S4, ‘cause iirc AJ was part of it)... it’s got to be somewhat subdued watching, now, to see none of what you’d thought you were helping tell ever made it to the screen. 

[aurelion-cerulean]

Time Skip Placement (Split Post 4)

Or in Which I Give Option 4 part 1

Note: This is a split up of my OG post, no new content added, just split for readability. [Full Post | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5]

Option 4: Time Skip Happens After Ep 2

TBH nothing much changes between option 3 and option 4, other than the fact that we get more time. This is also my choice: a mini arc before the final arc.

I really think the military showing up to address El will need to be a long scene. I can���t see it being less than 10 min. There is just so much here. They need to be show to find El. They have to have a fight with or for El. They need to be convinced that she is not the problem. Will they believe this? Likely not. OR El will have to run away and be hidden. This is likely (and would replicate S1), the question does then become where. I don’t have an answer for this, but I do think that it would be important to address this before the time skip, because they were literally right on El’s tail days before the time skip at the end of 4x9. 

Secondly the parents. I can’t see them getting to know what the children have been up to in the last few years as less than 10 min. In fact I see this taking a particular amount of time. The kids having to convince their parents to help actually could be a really good set up for the rest of the season (with them all having to come together). However having a sort of rallying together after the time skip could potentially be a bit strange, especially if there is a quarantine. Like wouldn’t their parents be asking a whole lot more questions?

I also wouldn’t be surprised in Dustin’s mother wanted to leave but Dustin was like we can’t. This doesn’t work after the time skip. Now this could be a big plot thing for the whole of S5, with them having to admit their issues to their parents, but still if their town is under quarantine, are the parents really just NOT asking questions? Are Joyce and Hopper really covering this whole time like, yeah nothing is wrong? This doesn’t have to be before the Time Skip. But if there are 2eps before the TimeSkip, this could be the basis of the plot of this 2ep minor arc.

El and Mike. This needs to happen and where it could be a quick thing, something tells me that it won’t be and we will see their reactions to the break up. This leads Mike to two potential conversations for Mike. One, he confronts Will about the painting and the fact that Will lied to him that the painting was commissioned by El. After Will so cleverly hid that he was in love with Mike, I don’t think it’s likely that he’ll just say it outright. This would cause tension between them because Will never lies to Mike (this would lead to Will talking to his mother and/or Jonathan) Two, Mike talking with his mother about why Will lied and his relationship with El. Do I think this could happen after the time skip? Yea, but if the Will talk happens here I have a feeling that Mike will need to decompress. Mike will have a lot of emotions he’d need to address. Or Mike just internalizes it for the next two years, and doesn’t address it. TBH that second option seems a lot like Mike lol.

Meanwhile El’s headspace in specific needs to be addressed. She’s angry and she’s distraught about Max. El would need to talk to someone about her powers and that she needs to get stronger faster, because she wants to save Max. This person probably will be Hopper. He would need to convince her that going too fast is going to burn her out, thus she needs to slow down — that she doesn’t have to race to grow up (important for themes). This specific idea doesn’t work after the time skip. If El is rushing around after a 2 year time skip, someone telling her “you can slow down” is just…No. Girl already took 2 years preparing. What do you mean she needs to slow down now that the final battle is here? No. The slowing down to grow up aspect could still work, but it's not as much of a metaphor with her powers lol.

This message only works before the time skip, which means we need to see El rushing and pushing herself before the time skip. This needs an establishment of at least a few quick scenes and then the talk with Hopper. She needs a good father figure who needs to tell her she doesn’t need to grow up so fast — or El talks with Joyce, which would lead Joyce to realizing what happened with Jonathan. I probably need to do a whole post about El’s arc, and how I see it in S5. 

Option 4 Continues into a second post or else this gets really long lol.

[calliecat93]

ST: TNG S5 Watchthrough Episodes 14-17

(Trigger Warning: The episode Ethics contains the theme of suicide. While I will try to not go too in-depth, as it is part of the episode I will be discussing it. If this topic makes you uncomfortable or is triggering to you even in the slightest, please skip the section of the watchthrough. Thank you)

Conundrum: So we have us an amnesia episode. Who’s the poor individual who gets hit with it? Everyone! Yes, some weird scan thingy causes everyone to lose their memories. They still know how to perform their jobs and all that, but otherwise, they remember zilch. I’m kind of mixed on how they did it. Overall, they are intelligent and calm about the situation, which on the one hand feels unrealistic. You’d expect far more panic and tension if you suddenly found yourself on a ship among people you don’t know. On the other hand at this point even without their memories, they’re probably used to weirdness like this (the S4 episode Clues had a similar thing happen) and it’s kind of refreshing to see people handle a situation without becoming paranoid assholes. Also… they make some kind of awkward Troi/Riker/Ro love triangle. Troi has some familiarity with Riker due to their past, which makes sense… but why add Ro to the mix? The only time they really interacted outside this episode was Ro’s intro, where Riker was a hypocritical asshole who made her take her earring off. They really don’t seem to agree and I guess the writers went ‘well they argue… so it must be love’! Which… no, going with this with Ro makes zero sense and it really makes it feel like Riker is playing both women, which both feel OOC for him, and even taking amnesia into account makes him look worst. Why does S5 want me to hate Riker? Otherwise, it was fine. Just kind of eh. Again we kinda sorta did this plot already (differently but still) and it doesn’t become hard to figure out who the one behind this is when you realize that they’re the only one getting prominent screentime who isn’t a pre-established character. Still, it’s just alright, but yeah that love triangle nonsense, while by no means the worst I’ve ever seen, really was unnecessary. 2.5/5.

Power Play: In this one, Troi, Data, and O’Brein get posessed on an Away Mission (Riker almost did as well, but it flew away before it could posess him). They take Ten-Forward hostage which includes Worf and Keiko, and later Picard. This had to be fun for Marina Sirtis, Brent Spiner, and Colm Meaney since they ge to act all evil… though Spiner’s already done it with Lore, but still XD So it was fine. It was tense and had some disturbing moments like Posessed!O’Brein forcing himself on Keiko. Dear God I hope the Enteprise has a counselor (aside from Troi since she was partially involved in this) cause neither of them deserved that. It was also scary to see Data acting like… well, Lore pretty much. Seeing Riker, Crusher, Geordi, and Ro trying to figure out how to save them without anyone getting killed was also interesting, it’s the first time we’ve seen a hostage situation like this in a ST show (Space Seed in TOS kinda counts, but that was an entirely different scenario and was more ‘hostile takeover’ than ‘hostage situation’). That’s honestly all I’ve got/ IDK, S5 has just been painfully average thus far where none of the episodes have been particularly bad, but only like… three so far (Ensign Ro, Disaster, Unification) have kept me interested. Maybe that’ll change here soon bu it’s just like ‘…it’s fine but I feel nothing otherwise’. 3/5.

Ethics: I again point to the trigger warning above. The episode contains the theme of suicide (though it is NOT carried out) so if this topic at all is uncomfortable/triggery, please skip this section. So what happened? An accident has left Worf paralyzed. Crusher has called in a neurologist while Worf, believing that he can no longer be a warrior in his condition, wants to be killed. Needless to say, we’re dealing with some heavy stuff in this one. We kind of have a similar thing going on as in Half a Life where Worf wants to die as according to his Klingon beliefs, his life is over since he is paralyzed. He asks Riker to help commit it as he’s his friend and naturally Riker is appalled at this. Picard breaks it down for Riker and that while we don’t understand it we should respect it… but again we’re talking about assisted suicide. I get what Picard is saying but just… no. The episode makes it clear that we’re supposed to be conflicted, however, and in the end, Worf decides against it due to both an experimental procedure and because Riker uncovered that Alexander would be the one who’d have to assist in the suicide if Worf did it. Needless to say, Worf ain’t letting that happen. It does make Worf’s feelings clear, however. His anger, his fear, it’s very hard to watch Worf in such a state. The neurologist, Dr. Russell, offers him a procedure that may work… but it’s a procedure that is still in the experimental stage and turned down by Starfleet Medical. Needless to say, Crusher’s not exactly happy with the idea of using a medically untested procedure on one of her patients… but to be fair, Worf has refused all other treatment and the use of implants and with suicide the only other option, I can see why Russell would be willing to offer. But at the same time, it does come across her just using this as an excuse to use said treatment which also has plenty of risks on said patients life/further well-being, and Crusher telling her off repeatedly is very satisfying especially at the end when Worf almost died due to her, and she seemed more concerned with noting it than what her actions caused and said that Crusher was jealous. Yeah, Russell sucks. It does bring up a lot of medically ethical questions, however: is it right to use an experimental procedure on a patient when all other options have been turned away or are available? Especially when said patient is suicidal or when it comes to said patient's beliefs? I side with Crusher at the end of the day especially since Worf is very lucky to have survived/recovered his mobility afterward, but the questions are still ones to point out. Then there’s poor Alexander whose on the verge of losing his father and Worf not wanting him to see him like he is and… God yeah. Just as I complain about the lack of impactful episodes, this one comes in. It’s a very tough episode with everything going on with Worf, the theme of medical ethics, and it’s heavy on the emotions. IDK how well I can say that the episode portrays it, but it certainly hit hard and brings up a lot of questions for the viewers. It certainly reaffirms how much I love Crusher XD 4/5.

The Outcast: /sighs/ Okay… how to go about talking about this one? In this episode, we meet a species of aliens that don’t use gender identity, and if they show signs of identifying as male or female, they undergo ‘treatment’. One of these individuals is Soren, who identifies as female and falls in love with Riker. So… there are many things that this can be associated with, but this was made as a gay rights episode. Now… let us remember when this was made. S5 was airing during the early ’90s. This was not a good time for gay individuals. We were very much anti-LGBT+ in those times and the AIDS epidemic where they were scapegoated as a public menace still being rampant didn’t help. In many ways, doing this episode was a bold move and I can respect them for at least is trying to tackle the topic seriously. If there’s any franchise that you’d expect to tackle these kinds of issues it would be this one. But the question is does it hold up 30 years later? Well… unfortunately, no. First, if they really wanted to get the gay rights message across… why was Soren played by a female actress? Maybe it was the only way they would have been allowed to do this, but because of it, it keeps a heterosexual angle that causes the message to be lost. We also don’t have any regular/reccuring characters as queer which would be pretty important to have in this episode. Considering that TOS took the risk with making PoC equal to white people at a time it wasn’t at all welcomed, TNG not doing so with LGBT+ individuals is rather unfortunate to put it nicely. Not to mention it sticking to standard male/female stereotypes as the norm when breaking them down to Soren, as well as Worf’s sexist/bigoted comments. That’s no even going into other identities such as transgender and non-binary. I’d really like to know what they think of this one considering the themes. As I am a bi/demisexual cis woman and this was meant to be a gay rights episode I will look at it as such and from that POV, the episode does not at all look great in a modern light.

Maybe I’m just far too nice and should be harsher on this, and I’m not gonna lie I’m horrible at addressing these things so I apologize if any of this came out wrong. But between this and The Host, it’s clear that the show was ill-equipped to handle LGBT+ topics. But at the same time, back then even considering addressing the topics in any way would have been risky. I do believe that there was a good faith effort and maybe in some ways, it helped when we improved later. It’s always hard to say if people should tackle topics they don’t understand or not. Naturally, it’s rage-inducing when they get it wrong, but it can also open the door to getting people to learn and to improve. Maybe this was needed in the ’90s and they did it the best way that they could, and maybe the fact that we can look at it and go ‘we know better’ is a sign that we’re better than when we were 30 years ago… or again, I am far too nice/too much of a doormat and I give the benefit of the doubt way too much. People who are more knowledgeable/know how to address this far better than I have here have likely done so and I’d encourage others to read more into those perspectives. Regardless, the episode overall is okay I guess. I certainly felt horrible for Soren at the end as she’s taken to undergo ‘treatment’ and Riker trying to help her get out of it. Her speech, wanting to just be treated as a person and not be treated as horrible due to who she is during the trial did really hit me and is why I think that the show did mean well. If she wanted to identify as female and be with Riker, she should be free to and then how she was forced to conform to her society’s views at the end when Riker tried to save her, it’s just... hard to watch. I wish that the ending was more optimistic/hopeful but I can’t say that the message wasn’t loud and clear. It very much reflected society at that time, and in many ways it’s still relevant today concerning how society treats those deemed outside the norm. But it also has issues due to the execution as I already mentioned, and I can only hope that Modern Trek (Discovery, Picard, soon SNW) and whatever they do in the future are/will be better at handling these kinds of themes because there’s no excuse to get it wrong in today’s time. 2.5/5.

I hope that I addressed things properly concerning the last episode. But it’s now done. We have nine more to go for the season. Let's see how it turns out.

[varietyofwords]

Ideal (Chicago P.D.)

Title: Ideal

Fandom: Chicago P.D.

Rating: T/PG-13

Author's Note: I probably watched one too many romantic dramas this weekend, but I was trying to make myself feel better after the announcement about Sophia's departure. To me, the best case scenario we can hope for after 4x23 (and given Sophia may be coming back for a few episodes in S5) is a follow-up to Erin and Jay's conversation in 4x21 about ideal living situations so this is what I came up with.

She will never get used to the hustle and bustle of this city - the constant honking of car horns, the way people push past each other on crowded sidewalks without the apology that comes with Midwestern nicety, the thin crust pizza being hawked by the slice at the same cart selling skinny hot dogs that don't deserve to be called sausage or bratwurst, the turf wars among precincts over which borough they serve, or the tunnel vision the highrises create making it is impossible to see city landmarks.

That last change was - is - probably the hardest to adapt to because it used to be she walk down the back steps of the District or swing by Firehouse 51 or chase down a suspect and be able to see Sears Tower standing up straight. Offering orientation as she floored the 300 or the Sierra or as she hopped over a fence in a foot chase. Now? Now she orients herself by the number of blocks to the FBI's headquarters, by the coffee shops and hole in the way restaurants that Lieutenant Benson pointed out to her the night she arrived in New York City with Hank's admonishment not to look back still ringing in her ears.

Advice Hank himself hadn't followed given that Benson was waiting for her at baggage claim, that the first person she saw upon arrival was someone from her past. It had been Benson who helped her find a place - one that was smaller than her condo in Chicago and without the floor to ceiling windows or the fireplace, but in a neighborhood that didn't feel quite so sterile or gentrified as the place the FBI set her up with. It had been Benson who took her out to the coffee shop around the corner from her new apartment and offered her a position in her own unit. Offered to open up doors for her at the NYPD that would let her out of a life spent in starched, white blouses and pantsuits.

But she had to pass, had to take Hank's advice that she not look back because she couldn't imagine facing the kind of monsters like Yates every single day. Couldn't handle the mental mindfuck that would come every time a woman was brutalized that way Nadia had been. And she had to keep the deal she made five months ago. Five months, eleven days, and six hours ago.

So much for not looking back.

"What can I get started for you, ma'am?" The questions startles her slightly as she had been mindlessly moving forward in line at the coffee shop. It is the same coffee shop that Benson had taken her to about two months after she arrived in the city, after it became obvious that the homesickness for Chicago wasn't abating with time.

The same, but different because it has been more crowded now, more inundated with tourists and the yuppies who bought the overpriced condos built on top of the hotel down the block. And now the barista moves down the line asking for orders before the customer can reach the cash register and pay.

"Can I get a large, black coffee and, uh, a large latte?" Erin questions glancing from the barista's smiling face to the board and back again when she sees the milk options listed on the righthand side. "Almond milk for the latte."

"Ok, I've got a large, black coffee and a large latte with almond milk. Anything else?" The barista questions nodding her head in reply when Erin replies in the negative as she scribbles the order on a paper cup. "Can I get an name for the order?"

"Lindsay?"

The callout of her last name comes not from Erin but from a voice - a male voice - further in front of her in the line, and both Erin and the barista turn to spot the speaker standing in front of the cash register. To see a redhead wearing a suit craning his head around the line to stare at her, to offer her a small, hesitant smile. And she offers him one in return as she tells the barista that Lindsay is the name for the order.

"Here you go, sir," another barista interrupts handing a coffee cup to the redhead. The grin on her face, the way she giggles over his charm causes Erin to roll her eyes because it appears that nothing has changed in the five months since she's been gone. That the eldest Halstead hasn't lost the charm that always got him in trouble, that always meant she had to listen to the youngest Halstead rail about how his brother needed to get his act together. Needed to focus on his career in New York and, then, in Chicago; needed to choose Nina or Natalie.

But he doesn't really offer her that boyish, charming grin as he moves to join her in line, as the two of them awkwardly dance around the question of whether or not they should hug because that's what they used to do. Quick hugs and/or warm smiles at Molly's when he'd join them for a drink after work or at their place - her place - when the game would end and they weren't so subtle about telling him that it was time to go.

Now, though, they skip the hug, and she finds herself curling her wrists upward so she can tug on the sleeves of her starched blouse under her black jacket. So she can silently address the discomfort she feels as he explains that he didn't expect to run into her here, as she wonders how much he knows about what's transpired in the five months since she last saw Will Halstead.

The lanyard around his neck announcing his name and his hospital affiliation explains why he's in New York rather than at work in Chicago, but Erin asks about the conference anyways. Listens to him explain that Goodwin has either started to trust him, or she just wants a week where he isn't around to give her more grey hairs.

The laughter Erin offers in reply clearly isn't the answer that Will was going for because the smile on his face doesn't reach his eyes. Because he's still staring at her with the stoic impression that Erin is convinced is hereditary as she inquires how everyone else at Med is doing while handing over a waded up twenty to the barista working the cash register. Because his eyes flash with anger when one of the four baristas working today interrupts the exchange of change and the exchange of niceties to hand her two coffees.

The flash of anger dissipates, though, as his gaze darts from to the two coffees in her hand to her face, and the anger is replaced with resigned sadness so quickly that Erin doesn't have time to really register what he's thinking. To say anything in her own defense as he mumbles about it being good to see her before turning away and striding towards the door. To even say his name before he's turned back around and moved towards her, before his proximity and his gaze makes it feel like they are the only two in the coffee shop.

"He was gonna propose to you. Told me that he knew he blew it, but that you were all he thought about. Had me get Mom's ring out of the safety deposit box cause you were the right girl," Will informs her, and the knowledge causes her to stumble backwards a bit. To lose her footing on the high heels that she's never really enjoyed wearing because it is too difficult to stand up right after such a blow. "And you - you really hurt him, Erin."

Despite all the years she spent learning how to suppress her emotions, how to make sure no one ever saw her weaknesses, the tears still spring to her eyes. Leave her vision a cloudy mess and a lump in her throat so she can't find her voice when Will tries to explain that he doesn't mean to hurt her. That he just wants her to know how much his brother cared - cares- about her.

Except she does know. Knew with every look and touch; knew with the five missed calls on the night she left and the smattering of texts after that. And she manages to find her voice not to tell Will that, not to tell Will that Jay is all she thinks about, but to wish him luck with his conference and make a break for the door.

Her visions is still cloudy as she makes her way down the crowded sidewalk towards her apartment, and the coffee cups slosh in her hands as people bump into her left and right. But the lump in her throat has grown and her heart is racing too much to take on the New Yorker tactic of scowling, to do anything other than focus on getting to her apartment.

Apartment not home. Because this is New York not Chicago. Because this is where she's biding her time rather than living her life. Because it is hard to move forward when you're still looking back at your past.

It takes some maneuvering with the coffee cups to open the front door of her building - almond milk latte spilling on the stoop on her building - and then to unlock the front door of her apartment. Takes further maneuvering around the half-unpacked boxes stacked in the hallway and the living room to find her past looking back at her from the closet-sized kitchen.

To find her past wearing sweatpants hung low on his hips and bare back muscles flexing as he runs the spatula across the frying pan, as he announces that he couldn't find the waffle maker in any of the boxes labeled kitchen so scrambled eggs will have to do.

"You were going to propose?" The question comes out more strangled and weaker sounding than she meant it to be, and the tone clearly catches him off guard because his head snaps around so he can stare at her. So she can see those bright eyes dim with a tiny bit of sadness as he nods his head eyes.

"You were going to propose," she repeats again. This time the question is more of a statement. This time he reaches to turn off the stove, moves the skillet off the burner, and spins around to face her. To rub his fingers against the hairline along his forehead and refuse to meet her gaze as he verbally confirms what he had planned to do five months, ten days, and roughly twelve and a half hours ago.

"You were going to propose, and I just left," Erin says as though he needs the reminder of what exactly happened that night. Of waiting for her at Molly's with the ring box in his pocket; of calling her repeatedly and driving by the apartment they used to share wondering where she was. Of dragging himself into work the next morning hoping to see her sitting at her desk and being told by Voight that she was working with the FBI. Effectively immediately.

"And you came back," he interjects because maybe she needs the reminder of what happened three months ago. Of sitting at Molly's staring at his fourth drink of the night wondering if he should finally let himself fall over the edge; of ignoring the sound of the door opening and shutting behind him because the rest of the unit wasn't really into drinking with a guy who wouldn't even try to be the life of the party. Of hearing a 'hey' in her voice beside him and wondering if he'd lost count of his drinks already until he felt her hand on his bicep.

They had ended up back at his place, at the apartment he officially shared with Will but unofficially had to himself because his brother spent all his time with Natalie. They ended up with her pantsuit on his floor and her nail marks on his back and not a lot of words spoken between them in the next three hours. The touches and kisses and caresses saying what they both felt even when they were in between rounds. And then, in the morning, he took her out to breakfast at her favorite diner, let her steal bites of his egg white omelete to balance out the unhealthiness of her double stack of pancakes, and asked if she was back.

She wasn't. And it had nearly killed her to see the way his face fell, to see the mask she thought he was trying to break down fall back in place as she explained that she was in town just for the night. That she had to get back to New York. That she wanted to stay so badly; that she felt her resolve to leave weakening with every passing moment.

She hadn't said the last part, but she had texted him as soon as she landed in New York. Texted him multiple times a day. Texted him so much that he'd stopped replying for a few hours and then come back with an excuse that his new partner, Al, had become annoyed with all the texting. Had taken away his phone and locked it in the glove compartment of that police-issued car he wasn't allowed to drive. And then texts had become calls. Short chats on the nights they both worked late and could barely keep their eyes open; lengthy ones on the days when she found herself looking up one way flights to Chicago.

So much for not looking back.

And, apparently, he had been doing the same during those phone calls because he's standing in her kitchen cooking her scrambled eggs and she's buying him a latte with almond milk. His ticket is round trip; Chicago is still his - their - home. But he's here to drown her in kisses at night and mock her pantsuit in the morning and, apparently, there was a time when he was going to propose.

"Are you still plan-" She forces the question to die on her lips because she doesn't want to know. What they're doing right now - the showing up on each other's doorsteps, the sneaking around dad's back - is complicated and confusing and undefined enough as it is without throwing the ultimate definition of a relationship out there. Without asking him to tell her if she's wrecked things enough that he's no longer considering asking her; without asking her to tell him if he's blew it so badly that she no longer wants to be asked.

"Do you remember me telling you about that couple? The ones that lived in separate houses, but were together for like, forty-two years?"

She remembers, of course. Remembers wondering where exactly he was going with that story when he first told it to her and then wondering how they went from him asking her to move in together to him telling her the ideal situation was him coming over for dinner and sex and then going back to his own place to sleep and work on the motorcycle she wasn't - isn't - thrilled about him wanting. Remembers him correcting her and saying that it wasn't ideal.

"I'd rather have that with you then nothing at all," he informs her and she finds herself shaking her head. Reminding him that they live in separate states rather than houses across the road from one another.

"Yeah," he agrees folding his arms across his chest and leaning back against the counter. His stare is unwavering much like his posture as he continues, "it's not ideal. But unless you're ready to stop protecting Bunny and come home-"

"Jay," she warns with the shake her head because they've had this agreement. Over text. Over the phone. And she doesn't want to rehash it all over again when he's standing in front of her and, according to his brother, may or may not have a ring in his pocket.

"So," he interjects with a sigh of frustration, "separate houses, separate states sounds like the best option right now cause, Erin, not being with you is far less ideal than cramming myself into those tiny seats on Spirit for a two hour flight."

There's a long, pregnant pause where she mulls it over. Where she wonders how they went from living together to being apart to him planning to propose to now contemplating long distance for foreseeable future. And then she finds herself nodding her head, offering him a whispered okay that she knows he heard because he breaks out in a wide, boyish, and charming grin. One that makes his brother's seem small in comparison. One that she sort of emulates - dimples appearing - as he crosses the room, as he pulls the coffee cups from her hands and places them on the table by the couch, as he plants a kiss on her lips and mumbles how he loves her.

Because, yeah, living in New York isn't ideal. Being an agent with the FBI rather than a detective with the Chicago Police Department isn't ideal. But the last five months and the weeks before that have shown her that not being with him also isn't ideal. And that's one thing that she can change right now, can let herself keep from her past even as she sacrifices for another portion of it.

"Do me one thing," she murmurs when the second - or, maybe third - kiss breaks, and she feels him pull away slightly from her. Watches her run her hand against his chest before tipping her head up to look at him, to offer him a stern look that clashes with the dimples she can't make disappear. "Don't propose to me. Not yet, anyways. I don't want it to be a rushed thing, okay?"

His gaze softens at the comment, and she knows it's because a part of him sees it as a dig, as a pointed comment about his past and how he made it to the altar the first time around. And there's a part of her that means it that way. That can't stand the idea of him ever describing them as a joke or a twenty-four hour thing or of their relationship being cobbled together in panic the way their decision to move in together last year maybe was.

"You know that I support you one hundred percent, right?" Jay asks, and the comment causes Erin's brow to furrow because, of course, she knows that. Has known that since their first ride along as partners, since he put on a suit and went to her high school reunion with her, since he waited for her to tell him about her past, since he pulled her back onto the force when she was falling down a hole, since he held her together when her world was falling apart, since he offered advice and support even when she didn't want. And when she tells him that, of course, she knows, he nods his head and says, "Then I can wait to propose when it's more ideal."

[twdmusicboxmystery]

2017 Re-Watch: 5x03 - Four Walls and a Roof

Okay, weirdest thing ever but I don’t seem to have done a rewatch post for 5x03 last year. I have no idea why. I couldn’t find it on my Tumblr account, and though I must have just accidentally deleted it. But I went back through my IG account, and it isn’t there either. So I don’t know if I just forgot and skipped that episode, or decided not to because I didn’t see anything important in it (that doesn’t sound like me and I don’t remember thinking that or anything) but it’s definitely not there. So this isn’t a repost, but a new one, simply because I don’t seem to have anything to repost for this episode.

Luckily, the events of this episode are pretty straight forward. Bob is returned to TF, legless, and he dies. And TF kills the Termites. That really is pretty much everything that happens in this episode.

It’s kind of the epitome of the TF’s brutality arc. There’s some brutality before, and there will be more after, but this is the pinnacle of it, and I am seeing ties between this episode and 5x16, where the brutality arc more or less ends.

On that subject, I think the title, and how they relate it to the episode is interesting. After they kill the Termites (very brutally) Father Gabriel emerges from the back room and says, “this is God’s house,” implying that such atrocities shouldn’t be committed there of all places. Then Maggie replies, “No. It’s just four walls and a roof.” I think that goes well with the brutality arc. The sacred places are being violated, and TF as a whole is in a very dark place/frame of mind. I also can’t help but see it as the religion being taken away from TF, by their own actions. And Beth, the epitome of Christian symbolism, is taken from them only four episodes later. Just saying.

Okay, let’s get going.

Gareth talks about the glass breaking eventually (Broken Glass Theory) and about how “nothing lasts anymore,” which I think is also an overall theme for the show. This is why none of their communities will ever last forever. Something will always happen eventually to make them fall. *coughs we never saw the downfall of Grady*

He also gives a bear analogy to explain why they’re cannibals. I’ll have to think on that some more. I know we’ve seen some very subtle bear symbols, specifically in S7. Perhaps we should have been tying them back to Terminus, but I don’t think we ever did. We just noticed the recurrence. Hmmm.

Sasha’s line to Father Gabriel stands out to me here. “You show up, we’re being watched, and now three of us are gone." 

The three was what really caught my attention. I’ll have to talk to a few of my fellow theorists about it, but it seems to me there have been theories about three major deaths before Beth’s return. A few possibilities occur to me here. It could have foreshadowed the rest of S5. We saw Bob, Beth’s, and Tyreese’s deaths here. And notice that she doesn’t say three of us are dead, but three of us are gone, which parallels, "She’s just gone.”

In S7 we also saw three big character deaths (Glenn, Abe, Sasha) and Sasha even says three of “us.” Also we have three missing characters right now: Beth, Heath, Sherry. So this definitely could foreshadow a lot. Not to mention, almost right after she says this, Bob is returned to them (proxy for Beth) and it follows some whistling (Whistle Theory) which foreshadows the Saviors who did the epic whistle in 6x16 just before Negan appeared.

I also think there’s a definite parallel between Sasha nearly attacking FG in this episode bc she doesn’t know where Bob is, and her actually attacking him in 5x16. 

In both cases, they’re in a church, both in a lot of pain, and both dealing with a lot of guilt. I think it probably shows the beginning and ending of an arc, which is why the mirror scenes. Starting in 6x01, we first see Gabriel actually being helpful to TF, rather than a hindrance. And we see a lot less anger and brutality from Sasha. Incidentally, 6x01 also kicks off Sashraham. Once she’d moved past this immense anger and guilt (which starts here with Bob’s death) she was able to move forward in a romantic relationship with Abraham.

Other great, thematic dialogue:

Rick: “We’re not going anywhere without our people.” He says several variations of this, talking about not wanting to leave Daryl and Carol behind. He says unequivocally that they’ll be back. That they don’t leave people behind. Perhaps a foreshadow that, later in S5, they’ll leave SOMEone behind?

Abraham: “Come noon, we’re taillights. (Taillight Theory) Not waiting for the other shoe to drop.” (Lost Shoes Theory). Lines like this just make me smile.

We see a heavy connection between Sasha and Ty as siblings, which is super important as we head toward the missing stuff after Coda, followed by Ty’s death.

Ty talks about how he knows what Sasha is going through because of Karen. He says, “forgiveness is facing it,” which I think is really beautiful, especially in light of The Grove. Sasha completely rejects the notion, though, and this is the beginning of her anger/brutality arc.

Some random details: We see red carpet prominently in the shot where Gareth and the Termites enter the church. Foreshadow that they’re about to die.

There’s a sign I love that it shows next to Eugene during this part. It reads, “Stupidity is also a gift from God but one mustn’t misuse it." 

Makes me laugh. I think it’s a funny reference to how stupid the Termites are being. They totally fell for Rick’s leaving-the-church fake out. Could also be a foreshadow for Eugene. He stupidly decides to "become Negan” in S7.

Gareth has some foreshadowing for TF here as well. “You don’t know what it’s like to be hungry.” This was fulfilled in 5x10 when they had to go so long without food before eating the dogs. But I really like this because it shows that even when they were subject to the same things Gareth and the Termites were, they didn’t become the monsters they were. Aaron even comments on it in 5x11 saying that he was impressed the group never turned on one another, despite their hunger, desperation, and being surrounded by monsters.

The clock in Bob’s room. This is super important and I’ve been talking to some fellow theorists about it. It reads 8:40, which points to something in episode 8x08, which will be the MSF finale of this coming season. Now, on the surface, that doesn’t make much sense. Both Bob and Sasha are dead now, so what’s this pointing to?

We think it has to do with the whole “good out of the bad” game that Bob and Sasha always played. They made a big deal about that game. The last thing Sasha says to Bob is, “what’s the good that comes out of this bad?” Meaning his death. Bob dies before answering, so Sasha is left to wonder and grieve.

At the end of S7, we can see that one good thing that came directly from Bob’s death was Sasha sacrificing herself for TF in 7x16. This is another cause and effect thing. Her anger everything led to her relationship with Abraham. His death led to her mission to kill Negan (it’s way more complicated than that, and there’s way more detail, but I’ll probably give it its own post later). Because of that, she gave them a chance to fight another day.

But I’m wondering if there’s more to it than that as well. Maybe we’ll finally understand something in 8x08 that will make Sasha’s entire arc resonate in a way it hasn’t yet because we don’t yet have all the missing information. In other words, I think Sasha’s question here will be answered in 8x08. Just a theory, though.

Also important to note that 8x08 will be exactly 3 seasons since Coda, so it could point to a Beth thing as well. 

I also want to point out that in this pic, there’s a cross, and what looks like an egg shaped stone holding a page open on a bible. All kinds of biblical symbolism going on there. Including, perhaps, an Easter egg?

I realized a major pattern from this episode: no one ever “puts down” their romantic partners. In this case, it was a conscious decision. Ty didn’t want Sasha to have to stab Bob in the head, so he did it for her. In other cases, it was largely out of the characters’ hands. Rick didn’t put down Lori. Neither Lori nor Andrea put down Shane. Rick also didn’t put down Jessie. Ty certainly didn’t put down Karen, nor she him. And of course Sasha’s love interests both died before her, so Maggie and Jesus put her down. Don’t know if we could tie that to Beth (we don’t think anyone put her down, so it’s kind of a moot point) but just something interesting that occurred to me.

Important to note that Bob and even the Termites get a burial. We first see the D.C. map here, which is an important symbol and will eventually bring Morgan to TF.

Finally, @boltthrutheheart pointed out an interesting detail from the end to me. Rick asks Ty how it was for him, getting to Terminus. Ty replies, “It killed me.” A very sad line, and to me, definitely a foreshadow of his death. Everything that happened on the way to Terminus (Lizzie, Mica, Martin, and now Bob) contribute to his guilt and he muses on them while dying.

Actually, now I’m writing this, something else occurs to me. The only two aspects of Ty’s hallucinations that DON’T occur between the prison and this moment with Rick are the Gov and Beth. The Gov is about Ty’s roots and reaches all the way back to S3, along with numerous other arcs that are still going right now. But how does Beth fit in? She’s kind of the one odd thing in that hallucination that doesn’t entirely fit. At least, not as well as the others.

To me, it’s just more evidence that things happened we haven’t seen yet.

But anyway, the other thing @boltthrutheheart pointed out was that Tyreese refusing to change led to his death. And he even proclaims it here, as though he’s having a premonition or something. “It killed me.”

In Beth’s time with Daryl, she proclaimed over and over again that she deserved to be alive. That she had changed. “I made it.” “I am strong.” “I’m getting out.” So it becomes an anti-parallel and in many ways an anti-foreshadowing. Great catch!

Okay, I think that’s it for this episode. Anyone have anything to add?

[jeanjeaniethings]

SPN Finale Thoughts

Please feel free to skip over this! I’m just all emotional and trying to get it out of my head by writing my thoughts out...I watched the finale once 12 hrs ago (and have slept badly after it) so there could be many mistakes here, and I will never pretend to be a meta writer... This is your ‘I am distressed and not in a great head space’ warning :-) 12x22 I thought was fantastic! I mean yeah there’s a couple of things I’d fix if I were being finicky, but it felt really right, was in character...the boys showed us that they have grown and the season’s themes were fulfilled and weren’t for nothing. I was left feeling pleased with it. I love love loved the boy’s convo when they’d given up breaking the wall down. They said what they meant, no lies, no pretending, laying it out. In fact they did that all episode (both, actually)....that’s some good shit! :D Also watching Dean’s expression changes as he thought of the grenade launcher plan was one of my highlights of the episode <3 I really liked Dean’s dialogue with Mary in the ‘dream-scape’...his “I hate you” made me gasp out loud, and yeah, when Dean cries we all cry.

So much brotherly hugging and wet eyes. Oh my boys, how I love you and how you love each other. Sam coming into his own, Dean supporting him 100%, the episode was gold just from those interactions <3 Dean acknowledging all the good they’ve done! Telling Mary he was Sam’s Mum and Dad, and it was too much! The lack of codependency! Jody's alive! Garth is alive! Donna is alive! Claire is alive! I am so pleased that Mary is a real, fleshed out character, and not just a plot device this season. Her survival is proof of that, too. I’ll be honest - when she was announced as being in S12, I thought they were going to mess it up :/ I mean, I don’t actually *like* her as a person, but she *is* a person on the show, thankfully. The shot of them (Sam, Dean, Mary) hugging, with Sam as the focus gave me life...he knows now that he can lead, he can be strong and not just follow anymore, his family has his back and gives strength even when they’re not right by him. OHhhh <3 <3 <3 12x23 I really, really disliked this episode, and not (just) for the last 10min of show. I felt the pacing was off, the camera angles sucked - in particular things like how we almost never saw Cas’ face front on but did Kelly’s, over and over and over. I felt like I was 3/4 of the way through the episode at one point, but when I paused it I was 8min in...it really dragged for me. I felt Cas and Crowley, in particular, were out of character (I’ll elaborate in a moment). I HATED how little a deal was made (music, face shots etc) of Crowley’s sacrifice. How he had Sam unprotected right next to him, Sam who has only just thanked Crowley for a little of what he’s done a few episodes ago, Sam who has tried to kill Crowley over and over again even when the circumstances didn’t call for it (eg after getting the first blade), but he didn’t even seem to think of him as an option for the required life taken - he’s obviously (to me) planned himself before even suggesting the spell; perhaps implied when sitting in the bunker pinned at the table? I hated how brushed over and vulgar Rowena’s death was, and Crowley’s response to it. She’s been in the show for awhile, is a strong female character, I should have guessed that her death would be as sucky as Eileen’s. Even grosser, really. The camera was barely on Crowley’s face when he learned of it, instead on Sam and Dean’s. Shouldn’t the emotional reaction be Crowley’s?? What the hell was the point of the last couple of season’s of them dancing around each other, trying to maybe establish something between them, then to end like that?! I’m hoping that was just that Crowley isn’t convinced of her death, and possibly was already considering his own (maybe not specifically, but him knowing that he’s backing the Winchesters, it’s a real possibility) I wasn’t surprised by but still hurt with what they’ve done with Lucifer’s character. He was AMAZING in season 5 - so fascinating and scary and compelling to watch. I know he’s become steadily a charactcature of himself since then, especially sped up by the writers not seeming to care/remember that Hallicifer isn’t actually Lucifer, and changing his character to be more like that. He’s had moments throughout season 12 where I could see the old Luci traits, but the overblown, over-sexualised (esp with the Demon who was working to free him, and the stupid Virgin line at the house with Kelly) crap they’ve done with him this season bites butt, and was kinda cringe-worthy. Considering how much I adore Luci (especially in fanfiction, rather than canon, where he can really be expanded upon) yet *I* was almost eye rolling at his dialogue, you know it’s bad. ALSO when has he been into disgusting murders??? Yes he likes to be hands on when attacking someone (or um, hand through, in the case of Baldur), that’s accurate to current and S5 Luci, but “stomped on her head until the white showed, then set her on fire to be sure” or whatever the quote is....ugh.no. And cutting some of her hair off, whyyyy? A momento? No.no.no. I haven’t decided if his lack of awareness of walking into a trap (the rip) was him not giving the boys enough credit (he did say about them trying whatever they were going to try but how it wouldn’t work) and him having such a big ego that he will always win (“I win, so, I win”), or actually him not being so bright. I’d normally think the first option, but he was *really* slow in the convo with the demon freeing him from Crowley in understand how the control had reversed, and I’m so offended with how they write him now, I’m unconvinced. I thought Cas’ dialogue was a bit weird and stilted (unintentionally) and his joke/reassurance to Kelly (”I lied, I have no idea how you feel”) and the nappy bit that was supposed to be humorous (haha look at silly Cas who doesn’t get human things and goes overboard, amirite?) wasn’t funny? It felt like a tacked on thing, written like they don’t really get Cas. Also why was he going through the rip, and then again casually with the boys, while Kelly was in labour? He said he’d be there for her and Jack, then wanders off leaving her unprotected, barring Mary, *twice*? Was he vowing to protect and be there then immediately risking his life another Cas/Dean parallel? Throughout both episodes Dean was super chatty (for him)! But it was awesome, because it meant healthy communication, and him reiterating that the family all together is what they’re about, it’s how they can do this. And EVERY TIME he included Cas in that <3 *SOBBING AGAIN* He even included Crowley once, which made me so freakin’ happy (and then scared for him). Sam, Dean, and Mary: walk into the house. Cas: “Dean!” Me: *looks into camera like I’m on The Office* CAS’ DEATH = MUCH CRYING AND HORRIBLE WHINING NOISE :’( Random Questions

I’m guessing this will be talked about in 13x01, but where did Cas go between being thrown to the ground when Luci showed up, and then coming through the rip to hold Luci off? Part of the plan I know, but what was that plan?

Why did he come back through the rip when Luci wasn’t yet contained?

What happened in there that we didn’t see?

WHYYYYY was Cas’ back turned when he did that?!?!!

Why no AU!Bobby in the Luci attack?

What’s his role in S13? Teaming up with Mary?

Is it important that when Cas healed Dean he had a nephilim yellow spark?

When going through the rip only one person needs to touch it to take them all through, yet the camera made a big deal of Luci grabbing Mary’s arm to pull her through with him?

Was it always the plan between Mary and Cas that she fight Luci back into the rip if needed? The boys obviously didn’t know.

Did Mary see/interact with the nephilim between knocked back by its birth and going through the rip?

Did Crowley make any plans/leave anything at the bunker to help with closing the gates of hell?

So..colt? Nah.

When did Luci learn how to dress so nicely? Okay that was just an excuse to talk about Leather!Luci...

Is it cold or hot in the AU? ‘Cause when Luci yells “NOOO” his breath is visible.

Mary and Luci in the AU is a Sam and Luci in the cage parallel, but...where are they going to go with this? AU jumping?

Is Rowena’s arc over? She’s been back from death-by-Lucifer before, so I think so? What a way to go :/

Is Crowley’s death permanent? I really feel it is, and although I'm so glad he went out by his choice and as a kind of hero and because his ‘good’ was winning out, but I’m so, so sad, I love him so much :’’’(

Is Cas’ death permanent? FUCK I hope not. I don’t think so, but I hope they don’t mess up his return. We really don’t need another altered!Cas, and neither does Dean :’‘‘‘‘‘‘‘‘‘‘‘‘(

There had better be the best destiel moment as payment for our pain!!!

Okay I’m going to go and read other’s thoughts on all this now I’ve gotten this down. I’ll probably re-watch 12x23 tonight and follow up here, methinks. Thanks for putting up with my drabble and misery <3

[sol1056]

What really bothers me about VLD is the disrespect the EPs had for their own staff. Their staff wrote a season where Shiro was the Black Paladin, and they not only changed major plot points - they were too lazy to properly rewrite the script. No wonder half the writing team left mid production, they were tired of their hard work being completely undermined and underrated by their self-centered bosses.

IWell, the first thing to note is that getting stuff written out from under you… happens. Things change; the execs get arbitrary or retire and the new one has different ideas, responding to the market/fanbase (ie an unexpectedly popular character), responding to trends (ie shows with girls are hot right now), responding to current events (ie skip the ep with the school shooting), VA death or unavailability, budget (ie cut the fight scene), and sometimes it’s just “we had this awesome idea and we got the go-ahead.” 

Some of those things, a head writer (or a really good EP) can see coming and will adjust in advance. But not all of them, and that’s just the nature of serial creation. Admittedly, you’d think a series like VLD — which is not broadcast weekly, but in seasonal drops — wouldn’t bother as much to adjust for the vagaries of things like scheduling, trends, or fanbase response. With the need to drop an entire season at once, theoretically it’d work much further in advance. 

But that doesn’t mean there won’t be some changes, along the way. All you can hope for is that the vision you were following doesn’t get gutted, and then your name stuck on something that the fandom loathes or the critics panned.  

However, I wanted to call out this particular bit: “half the writing team left mid production,” because there’s more to unpack, there. 

There have only been two points of turnover on the staff. One was in S3, when May Chan left the staff (I think she’s listed as staff writer on all S3 episode credits, but her IMDB credits end at S3E2) and Mitch Iverson moved from script coordinator to staff writer (starting with S3E4). The second was somewhere mid-S7, when Hedrick left and Hamilton became story editor. 

That, though, raises a more interesting point: from S1 to halfway through S7, there were never more than two staff writers (Hamilton and Chan/Iverson) and one head editor/writer (Hedrick). As of the end of S7, the writing team consists of one story editor (Hamilton) and one staff writer (Iverson).    

Here’s the breakdown of episode credits, including non-writing staff (EP, director) and freelance (per union reqs). 

Hedrick has 18 “written by” listings, and Hamilton has 20. Iverson has 9.5 and May Chan has 6.5, since they share credit for S7E1. Here’s what it looks like if we break out by season for what the writing staff (dark tone) produced, versus what they tagged freelancers (light tone) to write. 

Given Iverson and Hedrick were also writing the comics, the bulk of that work might’ve been going on while S4 (what became S5-S6) was being written. That would be reason to tap more freelancers to fill in the gaps. 

To compare, let’s look at another American cartoon of similar length as VLD currently (65 episodes). Avatar: the Last Airbender clocked in at 66 episodes, so it’s a good comparison. Here’s the writing credits for all three seasons. 

Of those names, six are staff writers. In 2005 (not including Ehasz as head writer), there were 4 staff writers; in 2006, Eagan left and Hamilton joined, so still 4 staff writers. In 2007, Chan joined, and the writers’ team was 5 people for the last half of the series. 

(Note: 7 names have half-credit to differentiate them as having written a segment of Tales of Ba Sing Se; some of them wrote their segments jointly. Almost every segment-writer was part of the production staff, ie directors or coordinating producers.)   

I mentioned “tapping freelancers” but if you break down the actual number of episodes written by non-staff, it comes to about 20% for both productions. It seems VLD shoved the majority of that 20% into S2 and what would’ve been S4 (current S5-S6). 

I’d need to compare to other series, but it seems AtLA considered 4-5 staff writers to be a good setup, plus writer’s assistants (which VLD doesn’t have). Additionally (and most curiously), VLD had a script coordinator (Iverson) for S1-S2, but when he moved onto the writer’s team, it appears no new script coordinator was hired to replace him. 

Which means, basically: VLD cut corners on its story the most. It expected a staff of 3 (or 2) to produce, edit, and coordinate everything. That’s madness — and that’s without counting side-line products like comic books. No wonder the chapter books and vlog scripts were farmed out. 

Considering VLD’s production from that angle, I couldn’t blame Hamilton and Iverson (the two remaining staff) from opting to reuse as much as they could. Even if they had time to rewrite, would they have had the cycles it takes to re-envision from first version to new? 

With all that in mind, if the two writers sat down and said, “okay, we’ve got to rewrite everything ‘cause JDS has this idea to redo it from the top…” I’m not sure I could blame them for cutting and pasting dialogue. In their shoes, I’d probably have to accept I’d need to do the same. 

I’d hate every minute of it, and I’d feel like I was betraying the story I’d spent so much time on, and gutting the characters, but… you gotta pick your battles. And sometimes, a job is what pays the bills, and you gotta draw the line or it’ll make you go crazy. 

You do what Hedrick, Iverson, and Hamilton have done — and what the EPs seem constitutionally incapable of doing — which is: you smile, you retweet for promotion, you say nice things in interviews, you mention nothing of the long nights or the migraines or the times you really wanted to punch someone in the face. You find a close circle of friends you can complain to over drinks, then you pack that away and move on. 

Not gonna lie, you do move on, but most people — it’s only human — may also sometimes daydream of telling what really went on. To someone, anyone, just for the record, so posterity doesn’t think they suck as writers. 

So, maybe we’ll get lucky after S8 drops, when the silence can be broken and we can hear what led to what we got. Until then? Just us and the crickets. 

[calliecat93]

ST: TNG S5 Watchthrough Episodes 10-13

(Trigger Warning: The section covering the episode Violations will be discussing topics such as assault and r***. While I don’t talk in-depth about the subject, it is a part of the episode even if they use the Midn R*** trope and thus will be mentioned. If these topics make you uncomfotable or are triggering to you even int he slightist, then please skip that section of the watchthrough. Thank you.)

New Ground: Alexander and Worf’s adopted mother have returned. Sadly Worf’s adopted parents are just too old at this point to properly care for a young Klingon child, and thus Worf agrees to allow him to stay on the Enterprise. Unfortunately not only is Worf completely unsure how to go about parenting, but… well, children are not always perfect little angels. Alexander is… well, a difficult kid. Worf having no idea how to be a parent certainly doesn’t help either him or his son. He tries, but… well, he tries. It’s perfectly understandable at least to me, why Alexander is like he is. His mother, someone who likely didn’t force him to choose either his human or Klingon heritage, was horribly murdered. Then Alexander finds out who his father is… and he sends him to Earth to live with his parents, who were no doubt loving but just not capable of caring for Alexander. Then Alexander is sent back to the Enterprise and again has to adapt to a new way of life, and his father not only is incapable of caring for him and clearly wants to raise him as a Klingon but is busy with Security duties and is now gonna send him to a Klingon school. And likely Alexander got no proper help with coping with his mother’s death or the various life changes that happened in a relatively short amount of time. I’d probably be more concerned if he wasn’t acting at least a little bratty. I don’t doubt that Worf cares about his son and he is clearly trying. Sending Alexander to his parents and now a Klingon school is probably the best option since he knows that he’s not able to are for him, so he has him sent tot ose who can. But without those proper emotional needs handled, it would cause a variety of emotional problems for Alexander like abandonment, anger, and… well, him lying and getting into fights is pretty expected. I was expecting to not like this episode, but it was alright. Alexander acted how I would expect a kid to act due to those circumstances and he’s never demonized for it. Worf isn’t made outt o be a bad parent, but someone very much out of his element and just not suited for the job at the current time, but he does try and int he end allows Alexander to remain, willing to tr and be the father that Alexander needs. It’s those kind of nuanced stories regarding parenign I wish that we got more of instead of them automatically having to be abusive or incompetent. I guess we’ll see what happens next, but still good eisode. 3/5.

Hero Worship: We essentially have a mish-mash of S2’s Pen Pals (Data saving/befriending a young child) and S3’s The Bonding (said child dealing with enormous grief but hiding it). So a young boy named Timothy has lost everything, including his family, and has been brought onto the Enterprise. To deal with the grief and pain, he decides to emulate Data, who had been the one who’d rescued him. As Data ‘can’t feel things’ (I know, I know, just roll with it), he decides to shut out his emotions and act as though he can’t feel anything. It is kind of cute to see how much Timothy looks up to Data and him dressing similarly and trying to act the same way isn’t surprising to see from a young kid. Normally this kind of plot I’d deem too childish for something like Star Trek, you usually only see this in children’s shows or comedies, but given the circumstances, it makes more sense than it would otherwise. Now I've made it clear how I dislike the whole ‘Data is emotionless’ thing since it's been made pretty clear that despite not expressing it in the quote ‘normal’ way, he does. It’s one thing for Data to believe that he doesn’t, but it feels like the show can’t decide if he does or doens’t. But for the context of this episode, going with this angle does work. timothy, being a kid and having the misconception that Data can’t feel, decide to act the same way in response to coping with the trauma. But of course, Timothy isn’t an android. He can’t live as something that he isn’t. He’s suppressing his trauma. IDK if just letting him keep acting that way as he slowly begins to act more like a child was what most counselors would suggest, but hey it worked. I just feel so bad for the poor kid, he blamed himself for what was a horrible accident, and when the kid finally breaks down… no child should have to ever go through that. Apparently pairing Data with kid characters is just guaranteed to make something good cause his interactions with Timothy were just really sweet, especially when he talks about how he wished he could do things like being able to taste as humans can. As I said, we’ve crossed this ground already and it’s no better or worst than say how The Bonding handled the topic of grief, thought he certainly does it differently. Still, it’s a nice episode. 3/5.

Violations: So… as I mentioned in the Trigger Warning above (if you did not read it, please do so) this is an episode about r***. It’s the Mind R*** variety, but it’s pretty clear what they were intending, so… needless to say, I shall repeat what I said in the Trigger Warning; while I won’t be going too terribly in-depth, if you are uncomfortable with this topic, please skip this part of the watchthrough and go on ahead to The Masterpiece Society. Alright, so now let's discuss the episode. The Enterprise is hosting a group known as Ullians, who are strong telepaths. They are all creepy as heck. Troi gets mentally assaulted, and… well the images that she sees make it very clear what the intention is, and yes, even knowing that it wasn't real did nothing to make it any less uncomfortable. Troi is comatose and while the audience sees who did it, the Enterprise crew has to deduct who the culprit is among the Ullians. So… how did they handle the subject? Well, they sure as Hell handle it WAAAY better than TOS did. I love TOS but if you’ve seen the episode The Enemy Within, while I do like that episode the way that they handled what Evil Kirk did to Rand, the aftermath with them allowing her supposed attacker to get close/in her face (yeah the audience knows it’s Good Kirk but no one else did and even then they should have NEVER allowed that), and a horribly OOC/disgusting remark by Spock towards her at the end makes it utterly rage-inducing to look back at. In comparison, the subject is handled with more tact and they do nothing anywhere near that horrid. However, I want to compare the different visions between the victims. The ones who get attacked are Troi, who I already went over, Riker, and Crusher. While Troi’s goes exactly as you’d expect in an episode covering this topic, Riker’s and Crusher’s visions (crewmen dying and reliving her husband’s death respectively) are very much scary but not portrayed as an actual r*** scene. So… umm… writers WHY did it have to be portrayed as a r*** scene? If we didn’t need that for Riker or Crusher (aka the only other female character), why do that to Troi when there were plenty of other options? Just to hammer the intent in? Which they had to have her go through it three times?! No, we didn’t need that. Troi’s been sexualized a lot throughout the show or given just gross, inappropriate scenairos like the whole prgnancy thing in The Child and Dear God the woman does NOT deserve that. Again, nowhere near as bad as in TOS, but still. Though credit to them, Troi does regain counciousness and is able to fight back against the culrpit when he attacks her again the third time (the second time is a little more complicated) so at least they allowed her that much. It is certainly not the worst thong covering this subject material that I’ve ever seen, not even in this franchise. IDK if the warnings were necessary, but it never hurt to be too careful. The episode was fine, certainly creepy and one I can probably rewatch without getitng angry like with The Enemy Within. But I repeat, quit sexualizing Troi show. The woman deserves a Hell of a lot better. 3/5.

The Masterpiece Society: What is The Masterpiece Society, you may ask? They are a society of flawless, genetically engineered beings. They are engineered to serve specific functions and occupations, such as the scientist Hannah Bates being designed as… well, a scientist. They also terminate the flawed/disabled such as the blind… so needless to say Geordi’s not exactly fond of them. The Enterprise is there because, of course, the colony is about to be destroyed. So… it was okay. I didn’t find it good or bad. It’s kinda how I felt about Transfiguration in S3, I don’t really have any serious issues, I just don’t have a lot to say about it. The only thing I do want to talk about is the ending. So after the Enterprise has resolved the Issue of the Day, Bates fakes another incident to cause an evacuation. Why? Because after encountering The Enterprise, she wants to leave, but her leaving will cause issues due to her role. Nevertheless, she and those who want to leave are allowed… but Picard questions if this is best as it may cause societal collapse., the very thing that the Prime Directive is meant to prevent Ugh… what?! Okay yes, they’d clearly have some issues to work out, but they also saved the colony from getting destroyed. They were saving innocent lives. Certain death is MUCH worst than some societal reconstructing. Yes, problems and conflicts would arise, that shouldn’t be ignored… but the implication that saving their lives from a natural disaster was the worst? I don’t… why did they shove the Prime Directive in at the end like that? Their ‘interference was done only to save the society and those people should be allowed to make choices for themselves, their society shouldn’t dictate their life direction. The comparison is just ridiculous and I was very much on Bates’ side when she made her argument at the end. One scenario is recoverable, the other is not. Otherwise, it was fine. Again, not much else to say. 2.5/5.

So far S5 has been… fine. IDK, S4 was really good and maybe my expectations got raised too high due to it. I’m still enjoying it, but the quality has just been alright. It’s not bad, but doesn’t quite have that oomph from last season or even S3. But we still have half the season to go, so still plenty more to go through.